第 175 期·中文精讀

揚尼斯·帕帕斯:歷史與喜劇

Yannis Pappas: History and Comedy

喜劇演員兼歷史愛好者聊如何把歷史素材寫進段子,以及喜劇創作、巡演生活與表達邊界的體會。

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中文精讀由 AI 基於原始訪談改寫,非官方翻譯,可能存在偏差或錯誤;表述以原音訊與官方文稿為準。說明

揚尼斯·帕帕斯(Yannis Pappas)家其他成員的履歷是這樣的:父親是律師、畫家、美軍中尉,布魯克林土生土長;母親在納粹佔領下的克里特島度過童年,後來做了人權律師,為聯合國寫過關於兒童人權的奠基性檔案,在丁金斯當紐約市長時還被提名過做法官;哥哥讀過布朗、喬治城法學院和牛津,手裡攥著一摞學位。輪到老二,大學一年級 GPA 0.67,讀完被要求重修,如今的職業是喜劇演員。

他在節目裡自稱家裡的廢物,語氣裡沒有一點自憐。他說自己唯一還算拿得出手的本事,就是讓人笑。

這場對話從權力開始,一路走到死亡、永生、騙子的魅力、紐約的政治、鬣狗的生殖器,最後停在克里特島的一場戰役上。看上去毫無章法,底下其實有一條線:一個不相信宏大敘事的人,怎麼在一堆碎片裡給自己拼出一套活法。

權力不腐蝕人,它只是把人揭開

Lex 丟擲的第一個問題是,權力會不會腐蝕人。揚尼斯的答案很乾脆:會。然後他補了一句更要緊的話,權力不會改變任何人,它只是把你身上最黑的那部分翻出來給你看。

他拿 Tim Dillon 舉例,說這個人絕對不能碰權,他連西裝都不能穿。西裝是有腐蝕性的,你把那身衣服套上,立刻會感覺到某種東西。揚尼斯說,如果 Tim Dillon 拿到絕對權力,政治異見者不會進監獄,做不出合格龍蝦卷的廚師會進監獄,整個後廚團隊會被集體處決,罪名是菜品不達標。

這段是玩笑,但玩笑背後是他對權力機制的真實判斷。讓權力變得危險的,是大多數人壓根不知道自己的黑暗面在哪。Lex 說自己身處技術領域,一直在刻意設計一些防止自己腐敗的系統。他舉了錢的例子:每次發現自己對某件亮閃閃的東西產生了佔有慾,就立刻掐掉這個念頭,因為怕滑下去。

揚尼斯接過話頭,講了一個他父親的觀察。資本主義把利潤動機放在了美之上。你去看老城市,那些建築原本是美的,現在的樓就是一個盒子,一切為了利潤率。他說這是"永恆感的幻覺"在作祟,人以為自己能把東西帶走。他父親生前常唸叨一句老掉牙的話:你帶不走。所以攢一個無限的數目這件事本身就挺可笑,像西西弗斯推石頭上山,只不過石頭最後會砸在自己身上。

"你得活下來,不只是身體上活下來,你還得在情緒上活下來。很多人忘了生存還有情緒這一半。"(揚尼斯·帕帕斯)

他把情緒上的生存拆成一個很樸素的動作:接受現實是短暫的,你只是其中一部分,而且沒有你的自我以為的那麼重要。沒有什麼是永久的,銀行賬戶不是,能力不是,記憶不是。他順手開了一個關於性功能的玩笑,然後說,連性別現在都不永久了,他考慮過下半輩子換個性別過,純粹是因為膩了。

真正能讓人活得有彈性的,是承認自己隨時會斷。他父親說過,太硬的東西都會斷。Bruce Lee 那句話說得對,Be water。

接受死亡這件事,本身就是一種自我欺騙

話題轉到死亡,兩個人第一次真正分道揚鑣。

揚尼斯的立場是,如果人生有意義,那個意義就是儘可能不怕死,接受現實。他給了一套政治哲學的論證:所有導致大規模屠殺的政治制度,根源都在於它們的信條是烏托邦式的,脫離了現實,脫離了自然。建立在幻覺上的信念,無論破壞規模多小多大,最後都會造成破壞。所以他反覆強調,承認自己會死,是成為一個好人、一個有道德的人、一個對社會有貢獻的人的基礎。

Lex 在這裡推了一把。他說,接受死亡很可能本身就是一種幻覺,你沒法真的接受一件這麼恐怖的事。真正誠實的反應是恐懼。他搬出 Ernest Becker 的《拒斥死亡》(The Denial of Death),說人類文明的大部分能量都源自對必死性的恐懼。Becker 之後有人發展出"恐懼管理理論"(Terror Management Theory),核心意思是,我們終其一生都在逃離這個恐懼。

揚尼斯反駁的角度很有意思。他說恐懼不像是選擇,更像本能。他自己被槍打中過,那一刻身體裡某種化學物質被釋放出來,帶來的是一種接受。那是程式,人是機器人,這個反應不受意識控制。所以恐懼是本能,接受也是本能。

Lex 順著 Becker 的框架回了一手:動物也會怕,但動物的怕是對具體威脅的反應,是"那邊什麼聲音"。人不一樣,人能構造出一個認知:這趟車有一天會到站,然後燈就滅了。把這麼一個概念裝進腦子裡,才是真正難處理的事。也許正是這件事給了一切以意義。如果一切永遠延續,明天見不到你,那就一百萬年後再見,什麼都變得無所謂,沒有緊迫感,沒有感受,沒有輕重之分,那才是酷刑。

永生最可能的樣子,是一群人坐著什麼都不幹

Lex 說他跟人聊過永生這個話題,推出來的結論是這樣的:如果人真的能永遠活下去,最可能出現的場景是一群人坐在那兒什麼都不幹。環遊世界、讀遍所有書、試遍所有愛好,這些事都會被無限期地推後。

因為所有激動人心的事都可以往後推。你永遠有時間,所以永遠不用現在動身。最後的結果就是所有人變成希臘咖啡館裡坐著喝咖啡的老頭。

揚尼斯對這幅圖景的反應是:那聽著像天堂,說到我心坎裡了。他說自己本質上是個很懶的人,一直在找機會躺下,坐著的時候都會想辦法把自己扭成一個能繼續癱著的姿勢。如果一件事總能往後推,那太好了。

父親:91年,60年煙齡,死於前列腺癌

揚尼斯的父親一年半前去世,活了91歲。抽了60年煙,一天一包的量,最後死因不是肺。

他說前列腺癌是男人應該走的方式。你一輩子把最多的精力放在那個器官上,宇宙就用那個地方開始回收你。這個說法是他的黑色幽默,接下來的部分很安靜。

他父親是那種一輩子只做自己想做的事的人,不計代價。揚尼斯承認自己繼承了這個毛病,好壞都繼承。如果按錢和名氣來算,這個性格害了他。他做一件事,一旦不想做了就直接停。History Hyenas 就是這麼停的。

但他也說,能愛上自己正在做的事,這種感受本身就是一種貨幣,也許比錢值錢。

父親去世那晚,他在房間裡。他和哥哥當時處於不說話的狀態,希臘家庭裡這種事很常見,後來和好了。他特意排了班,要確保自己在場。凌晨聽到那聲臨終的喉音,最後一次呼吸。他覺得父親知道他來了。這件事對他很重要。

那檔播客為什麼複製不了

History Hyenas 在2021年初停播。揚尼斯和 Chris Distefano 兩個人做了一檔歷史喜劇播客,粉絲黏性高到不正常。Lex 說這是他在所有雙人喜劇播客裡聽過化學反應最好的一檔。

揚尼斯自己也解釋不清。他說那東西像音樂,有節奏,是兩個人能量撞在一起之後自己長出來的。他們發展出了一套自己的語言,養出了一批自己的聽眾,然後在一片罵聲裡把它關了。

他給的理由是:這個節目在正式結束前幾集就已經結束了。他們在開始下坡之前拔了插頭。他把這段關係比作一場火熱的露水情緣,長期的婚姻無聊但舒服,真正讓你念念不忘的那一段總是戛然而止。正因為戛然而止,它才特別。

他提到了英國版《辦公室》,只拍了兩季就收了。明明可以繼續賺錢,但就是收了,那需要膽量,也正是這一點讓它成了經典。

他還提到 Leopold 和 Loeb 那個案子,兩個芝加哥的年輕人因為共享一套自創的語言和一套自創的現實,最後去殺了一個小孩,只為知道殺人是什麼感覺。他說自己和 Chris 的關係沒有那麼黑,他們沒殺小孩,他們殺了一檔播客。

維基百科婊:把歷史當成一起胡鬧的由頭

節目的名字來自揚尼斯最喜歡的動物。鬣狗是他從小的執念,歷史是他大學的主修,兩樣東西合在一起就有了 History Hyenas。

他們的研究方式,用揚尼斯自己的話說是:開啟維基百科,開始玩。有聽眾給他們起了個外號叫"維基百科婊"(Wikipedia sluts),他們笑納了。他承認自己做功課比 Chris 多,遇到真正把他拽進去的題目會認真挖,比如伯尼·麥道夫那期,是他們最後幾期之一,也是最好的一期。

他把這檔節目定位成 Dan Carlin 的反面。你去 Dan Carlin 那兒要的是準確和深思,你來他們這兒要的是一場帶著歷史的閒逛。有些集偏鬣狗,純粹胡鬧,只帶一點點歷史;有些集偏歷史,比如克里特島戰役那期,密度高,胡鬧少。不管哪一集,兩樣東西你都能拿到,只是配比不同。

他對 Dan Carlin 的評價很寬容。歷史學界挑他的錯,他自己也一直宣告自己不是歷史學家。揚尼斯說,就算他有不準確的地方,他引發了討論,這本身是好事。有人會說這是危險的言論,但言論只在一個地方才會變危險,就是教育失效的地方。美國的問題不是某個播客主持人危險,是這個國家的教育失敗了,是那些失去判斷力的人危險。亞里士多德早就說過,文明的未來取決於公共教育。

伯尼·麥道夫:con man 這個詞裡的 confidence

Lex 讓揚尼斯講講麥道夫。揚尼斯張口就說,那是史上第一小偷,GOAT。

麥道夫經營對沖基金,騙走了美國歷史上最大一筆錢。他的手法在技術層面並不複雜,是龐氏騙局,把新客戶的錢付給老客戶。真正難的是他怎麼撐了那麼久,而且騙的都是世界上最聰明最有錢的那批人。

揚尼斯拆解了"騙子"這個詞。Con man 是 confidence man 的縮寫,靠的是自信。史上第一個有記錄的騙子穿著講究,去找有錢人,開口就是:我打賭你沒有膽量把手錶給我。他玩的是對方的自尊心。那些有權有勢的人為了證明自己不小氣、有格局,真的就把表遞過去了。表一到手,人就走了。

麥道夫把這一套做到了極致。他把偷竊藏在"隨時可及"裡。每一場成人禮、每一個生日會他都到場,客戶打來的電話他永遠接。他把投資做成了一種稀缺品,不是什麼人的錢都收,你要擠進去。這種排他性是有目的的:他要的是那種不會注意到騙局存在的大魚。他給出的承諾是,即使在衰退期也能保證1%的回報。任何人只要動一秒腦子就會問,衰退期誰能保證1%?答案很簡單,他在拿另一個人的錢付給你。

這就是魅力的作用。騙子和精神病人最大的武器是討好、油滑、膚淺的魅力。人想聽別人誇自己,想聽別人說自己的點子了不起。這種需求會把防禦全部卸掉。揚尼斯說,這種需求來自我們想從父母那裡得到的那份愛,是弗洛伊德式的。而騙子恰恰沒有這個需求,他們不被共情和情緒拖累,所以他們能非常冷靜地計算,知道我們是他們遊戲裡的獵物。

"一個人不需要多聰明,只要夠冷酷,就能說服一群比他聰明得多的人。希特勒就是這麼幹的。"(揚尼斯·帕帕斯)

愛潑斯坦和聰明人的盲區

Lex 順著這個邏輯講了自己的一段觀察。他因為 MIT 的關係,間接接觸過 Jeffrey Epstein 那個圈子的餘波,很多學界的人被牽扯進去。他不認為那背後有什麼深層陰謀,比如某個情報機構的前臺。他更傾向於麥道夫式的解釋:一個魅力型的人,可能同時是精神病人和戀童癖,靠一張嘴把一群人攏住。

他給出一個關鍵細節:科學家其實不太在乎錢。衝著錢來的人不會去搞科研,科研的日常是極其枯燥的細節,你得真愛它才做得下去。真正驅動他們的是自己的想法被聽見。一個有錢人走過來,用極具說服力的語氣告訴你,你的想法是天才的,你的想法很重要。一個長期被主流學界排擠的邊緣人,面對這種誘惑幾乎無法抵抗。

Epstein 專門挑那些被排擠的天才。現代學術界最大的毛病,Lex 說,是大多數人想法趨同,而那些真正有想法的局外人被嘲笑。一個局外人專門去撈這些被嘲笑的局外人,用魅力把他們聚起來,名聲就這樣一層一層堆起來,最後堆到一個能吸引比爾·蓋茨和政治人物的網路。

揚尼斯用希特勒收尾。魅力是會讓人失明的。Kahneman 講過的那些認知工具裡,討好、油滑、表面魅力是核心幾樣,它們製造盲區。人想聽別人說自己好,想得到那份從小沒得到的愛。騙子沒有這個負擔,所以他們看得清我們在玩什麼。

紐約需要的是一個會算賬的人

話題轉到政治,揚尼斯的立場比他表現出來的樣子要複雜。

他說自己偏左,但紐約需要的是一個會算賬的人。紐約是一座錢的城市,華爾街在這兒。當 AOC 和她在地方層面的盟友把亞馬遜那個專案否掉的時候,他心裡的問題是:你以為一座城市靠什麼運轉?21世紀靠什麼創造就業?再多開幾家美甲店和披薩店嗎?

他的判斷是,那套進步派的思路太烏托邦,而烏托邦總以災難收場,因為它不承認人是自利的。紐約市對百萬收入加14%、15%的稅,一百萬在紐約根本不算什麼錢,結果就是稅基跑掉,城市重新爛下去。

但他同時承認自己是在給 Andrew Yang 說好話。他說自己喜歡 Yang 的原因很簡單,每次 Yang 開口他都能學到東西。Yang 給的是大量資料和資訊,觀點反而是次要的。比如紐約州每關押一個人一年要花超過40萬美元,這個數字一出來,問題就被重新定義了。監獄工業複合體也好,軍工工業複合體也好,凡是帶"工業複合體"字尾的東西,市場都出了問題。

他給了自己一套平衡的框架:自由市場是最貼合人性的東西,因為人性是自利的。但社會主義作為一套制衡機制,用來壓住資本主義的過度部分,在某些場景下是更合適的系統,比如監獄、公園,也許還有醫療。醫療是最難的一塊,因為希波克拉底誓言和市場邏輯很難調和,你怎麼能轉身把一個病人推出去。

他順手拋了兩個政綱:快餐店裡放一臺秤,超重的人不許買漢堡,只能拿沙拉;沙拉要補貼,因為現在漢堡永遠比沙拉便宜。還有三天工作周。他說三天工作周對經濟是好事,多出班次就多出崗位,人有閒了就消費,休閒經濟被啟用。五天工作周本來就是從七天工作周改過來的。

伊麗莎白一世:宣傳機器的第一個產品

被問到歷史上最讓他著迷的人物,揚尼斯先說了伊麗莎白一世。

他給的評價是:作為一個領袖,一個女性,在那樣的時代統治了七十年左右,把英國帶進了一段類似羅馬和平時期的繁榮,這幾乎是史上最成功的統治。莎士比亞在她任內出現,公共劇院興起,對外則是一路掠奪資源。

他特別注意她的公關能力。她終身不嫁,自稱嫁給了英格蘭,被塑造成"童貞女王"。揚尼斯認為這是一套宣傳工具。作為女性要統治當時最強大的帝國,她必須同時是馬基雅維利式的、理想主義的、營銷能力極強的。她走進一個房間,人們的感覺是上帝進來了。

他還提到一個細節:凱特·布蘭切特在《伊麗莎白》裡的表演沒拿到奧斯卡,因為格溫妮絲·帕特洛在《莎翁情史》里加了個英國口音。他調侃這件事,然後回到正題:宣傳機器加上真實的血腥,才是成功的配方。你回頭看她說她偉大,那些她不得不做的髒事沒進歷史書,但那些髒事很可能是她成功的一部分。

他還說了一句很尖銳的話:我們至今把封建制度當節日過。國王就是獨裁者,靠君權神授壓迫人。現在他們成了禮儀性的存在。那為什麼不搞一個禮儀性的元首,只負責巡遊,不負責壞事。

精神病人是不是機器人

Lex 問,精神病人本質上是不是機器人。揚尼斯先假裝被冒犯,說 robot 這個詞不能這麼用。

然後兩個人繞回一個共同判斷:機器人到目前為止一直在幫人,真正該怕的是人自己。Lex 提到自主武器系統,說槍不殺人,人殺人,這話已經被 NRA 拿去用了。

揚尼斯對精神病和權力的關係有一套自己的區分。他認為權力能腐蝕的是那些有感受能力、有共情能力的人。對天生的精神病人或者反社會人格,權力未必能腐蝕他們,因為他們的行為模式早就定型了,他們出生就是這樣,腦掃描能看出來。他們最能感覺到的情緒只有興奮。

這就引出他反覆強調的一條規律:想要幹成一件惡事而不被發現,最好的辦法是扮演成自己的反面。兇手都這麼幹,最壞的人都這麼幹。Bill Cosby 就是例子,一個道德楷模的形象是最好的掩體。Ted Bundy 也是,一個樂於助人的好人形象。他說這跟當下的某些"覺醒"表演是一個結構:我這麼善良,然後你忍不住問,是嗎?

Lex 承認這條規律也適用於自己。他公開談愛,總有人眯著眼睛看他,心裡在算他衣櫃裡藏了幾具屍體。人有一種本能的懷疑,一個人如果表現得過於正面、過於簡單,背後一定有什麼。揚尼斯說這是紐約人的天性,別人對你越好,你越警惕,因為在紐約,誰對你好就是想從你這兒拿東西。好處是你變得很懂街頭,壞處是你變得太犬儒。

狗把我們從野獸手裡救了出來

聊到動物,揚尼斯有一段很認真的表述。

他說狗幾乎是人類。它們會做夢,會焦慮。而且人們普遍忽略了一件事:沒有狗,人類根本走不到今天。從狩獵採集到農業,到城市,沒有一樣能成立。狗是我們在生存這件事上的合夥人。沒有狗幫我們看守作物、驅趕食腐動物,我們不會有文明。

他還糾正了一個常見的錯覺:人類在很長一段時間裡都不是頂級掠食者。我們被吃掉,被鬣狗吃掉,鬣狗是他最喜歡的動物,這件事對他來說是一種不公。他的意思是,從生態位上看,我們欠鬣狗的,但狗救了我們。

Lex 補充了認知科學層面的證據。狗是除了人之外唯一會用眼睛交流的動物。它們會看著一個東西,再回頭看你,再看回那個東西,用眼神完成一次指認,告訴你我們在合作。其他動物用眼睛看東西,狗用眼睛跟你說話。還有一隻邊境牧羊犬掌握了大約300個詞,接近幼兒的語言水平。狗的嗅覺受體有上千萬個,人類的數字小得多。

揚尼斯說自己每次想到狗都會起雞皮疙瘩。他有一條狗,他愛它。帶著狗在樹林裡鬆開繩子走的時候,身體裡幾百萬年的進化被拽了一下。他有個芬蘭喜劇演員朋友 Tommy 跟他講過一句話:要相信直覺,因為那是你所有祖先的生存本能在提醒你,有些地方不對勁。所以,別上 Ted Bundy 的車。

鬣狗:為什麼比獅子有意思

被問到為什麼最喜歡鬣狗,揚尼斯給了一整套理由。

獅子太可預測,天生尊貴,像班裡那個什麼題都會的優等生,讓人提不起興趣。鬣狗不一樣,它們靠的是狡詐,為了拿下獵物無所不用其極。它們會撒謊,會利用一切手段,而這種不誠實恰恰是聰明的標誌。

鬣狗在分類上很孤獨,和任何其他動物都不算近親,長得像狗,其實更接近貓,但也很遠,屬於自己的一支。它們是母系社會,這在頂級掠食者裡極其罕見。雌性體型更大,長著假陰莖,幼崽從那裡生出來,生育過程相當慘烈。族群內部允許同室操戈,弱的幼崽會被兄弟姐妹殺掉,母鬣狗不干預,邏輯就是:你弱,我讓你兄弟把你殺了。

它們的咬合力是所有哺乳動物裡最強的,能咬碎骨頭,一頭動物被它們吃掉之後什麼都不剩,連禿鷲都沒得撿。捕獵方式也不是硬碰硬,它們會繞到大型動物背後,先咬住睪丸,然後你就能看著一頭十倍於它體型的動物慢慢倒下。

Lex 說他得重新認識鬣狗,他之前對鬣狗的印象全來自《獅子王》,那部動畫把鬣狗塑造成了反派。揚尼斯糾正他:獅子才是混蛋,一頭新上位的雄獅會咬死上一任留下的幼崽。

這段聊下去,Lex 提到了一個他自己反覆取關又關注的 Instagram 賬號,專門剪自然界最殘酷的畫面。有時候他看完沒法繼續過這一天。他不知道該怎麼理解這種赤裸的暴力。揚尼斯說,承認它很重要,因為我們就是從那裡來的,只是被超市裡那塊包裝好的肉隔開了。

他還給了一個很少被提到的視角:自然紀錄片只拍捕獵成功的那一次,因為那才刺激。真實情況是,掠食者大多數時候是失敗的,獵物大多數時候會跑掉。你如果知道99次沒抓到,可能就不會在它第100次抓到小鹿時那麼難受。同理,黑幫電影只拍體面那一面。真正幹這行的是在勒索老人,不是在開好車。

第一場演出,手臂失去了知覺

Lex 問,什麼時候確定要幹喜劇。

揚尼斯的答案很具體。大學畢業之後,他一直在處理別人強加給他的期待。他誠實面對自己的時候發現,自己唯一還算行的本事是讓人笑。2000年前後,網際網路還不大,他連喜劇俱樂部的存在都不知道,以為 Robin Williams 只是個演員。等他搞明白原來這是一條職業路徑,就去試了。

他嚴重的焦慮症在那時候爆發。第一次上臺,手臂發麻,恐慌發作。他把自己第一場的錄影留著,可以隨時給人看。臺上他一直在說謝謝,因為忘詞了,只能重複謝謝。觀眾因為他謝了太多次而笑起來,笑聲一響,詞全回來了,五分鐘的段子做完了。下臺那一刻,一個從來沒在任何地方找到過歸屬感的人,第一次覺得,就是這兒。

Lex 說自己有過結構相似的經歷。移民家庭,世界告訴你要做某些事,你以為那就是對的。然後某個偶然的場合把你放進一個位置,你會有一種感覺:這個東西我說不清是什麼,但它是對的。對他來說,那一刻是五年前見到 Spot 那臺四足機器人。那一瞬間他意識到自己不想當教授了,不想做泛泛的東西,想做一件大的、瘋的事。這是他離開 MIT 的原因,也是他來奧斯汀的原因。

揚尼斯接著說了一段對"美國夢"的批評。這套敘事被賣成了這個樣子:你要麼是碧昂絲,要麼是名人,否則你就不值錢。他討厭這個。他喜歡瑞典那種地方,所有人都有醫療,普通人的一點點價值也被承認。想當門童就去當門童,都一樣的。他見過一些門童、一些計程車司機,比很多名人有趣得多。名人通常不是他們自稱的那個人,因為他們在經營一張公開的面孔,而那張面孔背後往往是精神病人。他說自己當喜劇演員的朋友很少,Paul Virzi 和 Tim Dillon,因為做這行的大多是糟糕的人。

克里特島:一個島拖住了整場戰爭

這是揚尼斯最私人的一段。他的母親當時就在克里特島上,還是個小女孩,經歷了四年的納粹佔領。她後來成了人權律師,思想極度開放,但一輩子沒法原諒德國人,就是過不去。

背景是這樣的:墨索里尼是希特勒的附庸,義大利入侵希臘。希臘政府回了一個字,Oxi,意思是"不"。這個日子後來成了希臘的國慶之一。然後義大利被打回去了,不只是被擊退,希臘人還反推到了阿爾巴尼亞境內,佔了一些地。

希特勒的反應是,我得親自來。他本來在準備進軍蘇聯,結果被迫南下。希臘本土淪陷,然後是克里特島。那座島花了德軍十天。作為對照,法國淪陷用了三到四天。

克里特島戰役在軍事史上有兩個第一:它是歷史上第一次以空降為主的入侵;它也是德軍在戰爭早期第一次沒有達成預期目標。揚尼斯和 Lex 都認為,這件事的後果被嚴重低估了。因為這場拖延,希特勒入侵蘇聯的時間被推到了冬季。這個推遲本身就是他失敗的一部分,和拿破崙當年遇到的是同一個問題。不要入侵俄羅斯,不要跟俄羅斯的冬天較勁。

丘吉爾那句評價被反覆引用:從今往後,我們不再說希臘人打仗像英雄,而是說英雄打仗像希臘人。希特勒本人在1941年的一次國會演講裡也承認,在所有對手當中,只有希臘人以不顧死亡的勇氣作戰。

揚尼斯講了一個詞,philoptimo。他說這個詞沒法翻譯,希臘人從小在家裡被教,它是榮譽、忠誠、友誼、利他的混合體,是一種氣場。他還講了一件事:奧斯曼帝國統治希臘四百年,你現在去希臘幾乎找不到痕跡。這種把外來者徹底抹掉的能力,就是他說的希臘精神。希臘人內部會打得不可開交,斯巴達和雅典,兄弟之間,但只要出現共同的敵人,立刻合流。

Lex 從蘇聯的視角補了一段。在蘇聯長大的人,幾乎沒聽說過克里特島戰役,就像美國人不知道蘇聯對二戰結束的貢獻一樣。歷史是勝利者寫的。揚尼斯接著他父親的話說,他父親講過戰爭的真相:人嚇得尿褲子,喊媽媽,戰場是一團混亂,誤傷自己人天天發生,技能有用,但很大一部分是運氣。他父親得過勳章和紫心勳章,但他父親的原話是,勳章沒法別在死人身上,真正該拿勳章的人拿不到。至於"他帶領部隊衝在最前面"這種寫法,他父親的說法是,那他是怎麼活下來的?前面站的都是小孩。

愛情是一個動詞

Lex 最後問,給年輕人什麼建議。

揚尼斯的答案分兩層。第一層是,做一個頑固地、徹底地做自己的人。真正的魔法發生在你頑固地做自己的時候,遇上另一個同樣在做自己的人。第二層是,在這種短暫的一生裡,真正的硬通貨是人與人之間的溝通,是友誼,是愛。

他補了一個他很晚才想明白的點:人容易把愛當成一種感覺,因為好萊塢是這麼教的。愛是一個動作。話可以隨便說,感覺可以隨便有,那些都是化學反應,跟我們自己的不成熟、心理問題、生存需求纏在一起。真正算數的是行動,是你出於愛去做了什麼。

回到節目開頭那條線,這大概就是揚尼斯整套活法的落點。權力會把人揭開,死亡會取消一切永恆感,騙子靠的是我們想被愛的那份缺口,帝國和播客都會結束。在一堆都會結束的東西里,唯一能抓住的,是你今天具體做了什麼。

節目結束前,Lex 開玩笑說,總有一天他會站在那兒,肚子裡插著一把刀,看著 Tim Dillon 笑著說,你不該信我的,你這個蠢貨。揚尼斯笑著接了這句。

兩個人的對話就這樣收在了一個玩笑上。這大概也是他說的那件事本身:所有好的東西都會結束,所以結束之前,要玩得開心一點。

  • 想判斷一個人會不會被權力毀掉,別看他現在說什麼,看他有沒有能力察覺自己的黑暗面。做任何決定之前先問一句:如果沒人看著,我會怎麼做。
  • 給家人錄一次音。用播客、用手機、用任何東西都行,把注意力放在對方身上幾個小時,問那些平時不敢問的問題。這件事拖到明年,很可能就永遠做不成了。
  • 把"愛"從感覺改成動作。每天挑一件具體的事做出來,而不是等那種感覺回來。
  • 接受任何一件事都有結束的時候。在開始下坡之前主動叫停,比撐到爛掉體面得多,哪怕代價是錢。
  • 遇到別人對你格外好,先別急著卸下防備,也別急著懷疑。問一句他要什麼,然後再決定信不信。
  • 想知道自己真正擅長什麼,回想有沒有哪一個時刻,你第一次覺得"就是這兒"。那種感覺比任何職業規劃都準。
  • 看歷史的時候多想一層:誰寫的,誰被刪掉了。然後至少去讀一遍被刪掉的那一方的版本。
  • 養一條狗。人類能走到今天,有一半功勞是它的祖先的。
文稿來自公開 Kaggle 資料集(rajneesh231/lex-fridman-podcast-transcript),為早期自動轉錄存檔,可能存在識別錯誤。
The following is a conversation with Yannis Papas, a comedian who cohosted the podcast History Hyenas that I came across when I was researching the Battle of Crete from WWII. He and his cohost were hilarious in their rants about history and about life. The chemistry they have is probably the best of any cohosted comedy podcast or even podcast in general that I've ever heard. As of a few weeks ago, unfortunately, History Hyenas is no more, at least for now, because all good things must come to an end. But Yannis hosts a new podcast called Long Days with Yannis Papas, plus he has a comedy special on YouTube for free. Quick mention of our sponsors, WineAxis, Blinkist, Magic Spoon, and Indeed. Check them out in the description to support this podcast. As a side note, let me say that some of you have noticed that I have not spoken with too many computer scientists, physicists, biologists, or engineers recently. The reason has to do mostly with the risk aversion of many of these folks in the time of COVID, especially as they get closer to taking the vaccine. I'm tested several times a week and still some people are just more willing than others to have an in person conversation in these times. I only do these podcasts in person because I look for the possibility of a genuine human connection. I'm willing to sacrifice a lot for that. Maybe it's silly, but I look for the magic that Charles Bukowski writes about in his poem Nirvana. The magic that is somehow in the air on those rare occasions when two people meet, talk, and you notice that while on the surface you may be worlds apart, you're still somehow woven from the same fabric. I've had that with many guests, Jim Keller comes to mind, but many others as well. I'm an AI person, machine learning, robotics, computer science is my passion. Trust me, I can't wait to be having more technical conversations again, but I will also continue to mix in comedians, musicians, historians, and of course, wise all seeing sages like Giannis Papas and Tim Dillon, just to keep it, as Tim likes to say, fun. This is the Lex Friedman podcast, and here is my conversation with Giannis Papas. You've cohosted, until recently, an amazing history comedy podcast called The History Hyenas. So you're a bit of a student of history? Yeah, an F student of history. F student. Okay, I thought it was more like a D minus. D minus, yeah. Okay. Still got to repeat the grade if you get all D minuses. I actually had a.67 GPA average my freshman year and I had to do it again. This podcast is going to be the spectrum of human intelligence. It runs the gamut from there to here. So this is going to set the low bar. I'm barely sliding into human, I'm closer to chimp. And I bring that up that you're also friends with the great, the powerful Tim Dillon. So let's talk about power and the corrupting effects of power. Sometimes I look at Tim Dillon as he grows in power. Oh, I thought you meant in size. Well, size, I think they're correlated. Yeah. I saw him, I've been in Austin a couple of days, I saw him once, we had eight meals in one day. Eight meals. Yeah. So I feel like I've been here longer than I have just because of the meals with Dillon. Kid likes biscuits and barbecue. Okay. So he's more like, see, I was imagining Putin or somebody like that. He's more like the North Korean dictator. Okay. Yeah. All right. They get along great, those two. Yeah. I mean, Tim Dillon and King Jong Un would be like, they could make like a buddy cop movie. They would get along like Lethal Weapon. That would be a good pitch movie. Great podcast. Yeah. That would be a great podcast. Yeah. So much to talk about. So many similar ideas about the world. So what do you think the world would look like if Tim Dillon was given absolute power? He seems like a person that's an interesting study of the corrupting effects of power. Yeah. You don't want to give him power. You don't want, I don't even want him wearing a suit. Like I want a guy who's as thoughtful and educated as you wearing a suit. Like cause you know, suits corrupt you. You put that suit on, you start feeling that power. You start. Definitely. It's like, you know, yeah. I don't even want Tim Dillon in a suit. Power would, he would kill people. He'd get rid of anything that he deemed. I mean, if you made a lobster roll and it wasn't up to Tim Dillon's standard, he would have you executed. The entire restaurant staff is just gone. He would have people below his food standard execute. There'd be programs, not of people who are political dissidents, but of people who don't meet his food standard. His cuisine standard is high and he's usually right. Do you think power does corrupt people? Yes. Like one of the reasons we mentioned offline Joe Rogan, he's been an inspiration to me cause he gets, he gets, if you get power, just more famous and famous and yes, probably a bit of power in terms of influence and he's still pretty much the same guy. I'm not sure that's going to be true for everybody. Do you ever think, ask yourself that question? Yeah. He's a rare breed. He's like a benign king. Most people I meet who are like really powerful are like douchebags and that's how they got there. I think that's, psychopaths have the advantage because they don't have feelings and Joe's a rare example. He's just a powerhouse of will and he, I do think about that. Yeah. I think I should be stopped right now. Just stop me right now because yeah, power for me, I would, when people get power, they indulge. It doesn't change anyone. It just reveals your darkest, you know, people aren't supposed to have anything they want. You got to be able to struggle for everything. So I would have a harem, I'd be like a Roman dictator. Yeah. I'd be like a Roman emperor. I mean, people called them emperors. They were dictators. The most effective leaders are dictators. I hope we get back to that. Democracy hasn't worked. I'm ready for a secession of Caesars and I want to start with AOC. That's true. Dictators get the job done. They do. They do. At a certain point you got, that's why social workers can only get you so far. You need action. I was a social worker for five years and all you do is ask about medications and you don't solve anything. I do ask myself of that, like, cause I'm more in the tech space of constructing systems that prevent me from being corrupt. Cause right now I'm all about love and all about those kinds of things. But I wonder, you said like, it just reveals the darkness. The problem is we might not be aware of our own darkness. I have the same feeling about money actually. I've been avoiding thinking about money, like basically constructing my moral system, my moral compass around money. It's like the moment I feel a little too happy about the idea of owning some cool shiny thing, I started to think, okay, I'm not going to own that shiny thing cause I'm afraid of the slippery slope of it. Yeah. You ever think about that kind of stuff? Yeah. The thing about the capitalist system is it puts sort of a profit motive above beauty. And you notice when you see certain cities, especially in the old days where like buildings used to be beautiful and now they're just like boxes, they throw a kid up and it's just for all profit margin. It's the illusion of permanence that, you know, it's like, oh, let me get as much money as I can. You're like, yeah. You know, my dad used to say, you know, everyone, it's a cliche, but you can't take it with you. So it's kind of, it's, it's comical to me that we're here trying to get this infinite amount. Like it's like Sisyphus, we're all trying to climb this hill, but I mean, the rock's going to fall on us. So I think that's a healthy outlook. Yeah. My dad always used to say before he passed, you know, he would say, you can't, you have to survive not only physically, but you have to survive emotionally. I think a lot of people forget about the emotional part of a survival. You have to survive emotionally and humor and, and, and understanding reality in its objective context helps with that. Accepting reality as this ephemeral thing that you're really just a part of, but not as significant as your ego wants you to believe is a, is a start. That's a good foundation for surviving emotionally. What's that mean? Surviving emotionally? Like what, what's an ideal life look like while you're thriving? You can't take things too seriously. You can't, because they're ephemeral. They're not permanent. Nothing's permanent. Your bank account's not permanent. Your abilities aren't permanent. Nothing's permanent. Your abilities aren't permanent. Your memory's not permanent. Your, your, your dick getting hard is not permanent. Can I curse on this or is this go out to, yeah, you can curse to your heart's content. Okay. Yeah. I mean, gender's not even permanent anymore. I think I'm gonna, I'm gonna change maybe and live my second half as another gender just to have, I'm bored with this gender. So it's like nothing is permanent. And so accepting that emotionally is a good start to being more flexible. You gotta be flexible. Like my dad used to say, anything too stiff snaps. You gotta, you know, it's a cliche and people have said it a bunch of different ways, but Bruce Lee's right, man. Be water. Be water. Yeah. Bukowski has this quote about love, that love is a fog that fades with the first light of reality. So he's, he's a romantic, that guy. But that even love is a thing that just doesn't last very long. No. Um, you know, some people would disagree with that. Maybe it morphs, like, like, like water, it changes, right? It might not be, it might not be this, cause he's mostly just, uh, loved like prostitutes, I think. So, The best kind of love. Yeah. No demand. No, uh, responsibilities. Yeah. It's a financial transaction. Yeah. Uh, ephemeral as ever. You mentioned your dad. He passed away, uh, two, uh, a year and a half ago. Yeah. What did you learn from him? I love my dad. My dad, I would say my dad was my, my hero. He was just, uh, my dad really embodied those values and I think, um, for better or worse, it's made me who I am. He's, he, uh, my dad was, was a painter, he was a lawyer, he was, uh, he was, uh, you know, a Lieutenant in the military. New Yorker. New Yorker. Born and bred Brooklyn. His dad, his dad, you know, uh, surprise owned a diner. So that's, that's sort of the Greek passport. That's the immigration passport for Greeks into America. And, um, yeah, my dad played football. He just, my dad did what he wanted. He lived as he wanted at all costs and I think I got that from him for better or worse. I think it's hurt me in my pursuits. Uh, if you consider money and fame, uh, to be paramount, you know, I, I've always done what I wanted and if I stopped wanting to do it, I just stopped doing it. I think I got that from my dad. So maybe for better or worse, that's what I learned from him. But that's a real currency, you know, feeling like you're in love with what you're doing when you're doing it, maybe perhaps that's worth more than money. I don't know. You miss him? Yeah. Every day. Every day. But I'm happy that, uh, he, he got 91 years. It's very rare. I mean, he smoked for 60 years. Talk about like a guy who was an outlier and he smoked like 60 years, like packs. I mean, and he didn't die from that. He died. He had a prostate cancer, which is the way men should go. Your dick should give out. It should start from the dick. I mean, we focus so much of our life on the dick that that's the way that's a successful life and that's why every man eventually gets prostate cancer because that is the universe's way of saying like the thing you focused on the most is you put the most energy into is the thing that's spent and it's going to, your, your rotting is going to start there. So that's a successful life and it just spread all over his body and he slowly died. I was with him when he died and that meant a lot to me because me and my brother weren't talking at the time cause we're Greeks, we're, we're talking again, but that's how it is. You got a few brothers, right? I got two brothers, but I wanted to make sure I was with him when he died and I got lucky and I was in the room with him when he died. You were in the room with your brother and you weren't. No, my brother wasn't there. We were kind of doing shifts. I was, I was there. I spent the night, the dad, my, the night my dad died, he died in the early in the morning and I heard the death rattle last breath and it was just, I think it was, uh, I, he knew I was there and, uh, I think that just probably meant something to him and I'm just glad I was there. Does that make you sad that, uh, life is ephemeral, like you said, that, that you die? Yeah. What do you think about your own death? You meditate on that? I think it, I think the actual, if there is a point to life, it's to, um, hopefully not fear death, to accept reality. I think that's important. I think so much goes awry in the human condition when we lose touch with reality. Every, uh, political system that's led to mass murder and everything, I think because it's because the, the tenants of those political philosophies ended up being utopian. They were detached from reality, detached from nature. And so I think it's, it's very important to accept and acknowledge your own mortality. I think it's the foundation for what makes a good person, a moral person, um, a contributing member of society because it's true. True things should be the foundation of all things. If, if, if what you believe is based on illusion, you're going to end up doing destruction. Whether that destruction is on a scale of one to 10, you are going to be destructive because it's not real. It's a fantasy. It doesn't exist. See, the thing is the truth is about, I don't think you can ever reach truth. Truth is about like constantly digging and to push back on your idea that you should accept death. I think the more honest response to death, so the least honest is to run away from it, create illusions that help you imagine that there's not a death. Uh, the next is to accept it, but the real honest one is to fear it because I, I, I mean, I'm, I'm with, uh, Ernest Becker is a philosopher, uh, wrote a book called Denial of Death. He says that the, like much of the human condition is based in the fear of mortality. That we like, that's, that's the creative force of the human energy. Like Freud said, do you want to sleep with your mother? He said, no, that's not what motivates you. Maybe his mom wasn't hot though. I mean, or he wasn't Greek because apparently at a poll, we found that we found that all things good and bad. Yeah. Thanks. Thanks for that. Thanks. I just don't know if his mom was a looker or not. I mean, I'd have to Google it. All right. Yeah. I'll look up on Google images. Yeah. But I think the honest, as he says, the thing that we run away from is that there's a terror. He calls it like terror. Uh, there's something called terror management theory. That's some philosophers after him followed on that we're basically trying to run away from this fear and acceptance is actually creating an illusion for yourself. Like you can actually accept something as terrifying as this. So he's more with the stoics, the stoic constantly meditate on their death. I mean, they, what does that mean? I mean, it's kind of, it's, you know, acceptance of death isn't a thing you do like on a Monday and then you're done is a thing you constantly have to meditate on, like reminding yourself like this ride is over. It could be over today. And that's something you're, if you think about every single day, it gives you an appreciation of Woody Allen movies, at least it gives you appreciation of basically everything, including Woody Allen movies, which shows you how deep your appreciation for life could be. I've actually haven't been following much about what Woody Allen's, but apparently he's been a troublemaker through most of his life. He's yeah. I mean, you know, he's caused a little bit of strife. He's left a little, uh, yeah, he's left a little confusion in his wake for sure. But I mean, you know, that's another one separate the art from the artist. He's got, I mean, the guys will go down in history as the greatest he's made, I mean, maybe a year and they're all, you can always find something good about each movie, like the dialogue or whatever. Um, I love what you're saying. It's interesting, but the only thing I would say to push back a little bit since we're playing a little table tennis here is, um, I don't know if it's a choice to fear death. That's more of an, it seems more instinctual. It seems like something that nature wants you to do because I've been in positions where I thought I was going to die. Like I've been shot and I had those moments and then nature also, uh, you know, kicks in an instinct, which is acceptance where you kind of, I don't know, it's a chemical release or whatever. I don't know, you know, we're all, we're robots basically. So some sort of chemical is released that protects you, but there is an acceptance. I don't know how much, uh, of it was a conscious choice, probably very little. Um, and that's the point I'm making is it's, it's instinctual. We don't really have a choice in fearing death. Otherwise there would be no progression. We wouldn't all life seems to want to survive, uh, not by choice, but by instinct. So he, he argues that the fear is not the instinctual of, it's not the animalistic stuff. That's the thing that makes us special is the, what humans are able to do is to have a knowledge that we're going to die one day. Animals don't have that animals. Fear is instinctual. It's like, Holy shit, what's that sound over there? He says, we're actually able to contemplate the fact that this ride ends and that that kind of cognitive construct is difficult for us to deal with. Like what the hell does that mean? Like just to, just to think about, it's going to be over at a certain point, it's just over lights out. Like it's very difficult to kind of load that into whatever this like little brain we got. Like, what does that actually mean? Maybe that's what gives everything meaning. Yeah. Because if everything lasted forever, if, uh, if this went on ad infinitum, there would be no meaning to it. I'd be like, Hey, if I don't see you tomorrow, I'll see in a million years, there would be no meaning. There'll be no urgency. There would be no feelings. There'd be no, uh, nothing of magnitude or superficiality. It would all just be this kind of, it would be torture. It would actually, that would actually be torture to be here forever. I mean, I'm already sick of this place and I'm just in my forties. Like I'm done. I'm sick of me. I'm sick of everything. You know, a lot of people, when they talk about mortality, they consider, they consider mortality appealing because you get a chance to do basically all these things you might not get a chance to do otherwise, like all the kinds of travel broadly, explore, read every book, explore every idea, do every hobby, all those kinds of things. The idea I was talking to mentioned, uh, the reality of being immortal would be more likely, I like this idea, more likely would be you just sitting there doing nothing because, and putting off all that travel and exploration to later because you'll always have time. And so what you're going to have, what actual immortality would look like for a bunch of humans is people sitting there doing nothing. It would be like a Greek caffineer just sitting around drinking coffee. I love it. Yeah. I mean, it's a lazy man's paradise. Yeah. But it's so interesting because that, that's, that rings true to me for what humans are like is we'll basically just put off all those exciting adventures and just be lazy, become lazier and lazier and lazier because you'll always have a chance to do all the exciting things and we'll just get, we'll basically become Tim Dillon. We just sit there and have a podcast and that's it. He works hard. Um, yeah. I mean, that sounds actually like heaven, dude. That's speaking to my heart really. I mean, I'm at heart, I'm a very lazy person. I always try to find ways to lie down. Like if I'm sitting, I'll figure out a way to kind of contort myself to later. That's an interesting thing to like in, yeah. If you can always push something off, yeah, that, I like that. I think that's heaven. it is. It's beyond my comprehension. But with Chris, there was this magical chemistry that, you know, I have chemistry with a lot of people and it can be funny and I feel zero chemistry here. This is great. Yeah. It's a little bit more intelligent than what me and Chris did. But you know, me and Chris, I think we connected on the funny bone. Like I, he, I found him so funny and we found the same things funny. And from that, these organic expressions came from some part of our brains that was created from this chemistry. And yeah, we just developed this language and this cult following and people were really upset when we ended. But it was the right thing to end because like all things that end, it was kind of done a few episodes even before we finished. And I think we pulled the plug before it started rolling downhill, like all, you know, like all great flings, you know, there's your long relation, long marriages are boring and comfortable. The one you really like fucking always ends abruptly and sadly and, but you always look back and you jerk off to it. And so you guys made love and we made, yeah. So it's like, it was like a hot fling with me and him and it was intense and we burned the candle at both ends. And it was, I think that podcast was meant to be three years and maybe people will go back and appreciate it and listen to it over and over again. And I think the new things we do, people will love, I'm doing long days now, that podcast and people seem to enjoy it. I've been really enjoying the long days on YouTube. I just found myself just like staring at you ranting for, same with Tim Dillon, I really enjoyed the, whatever those rants are, the genius of just one thing after the other. But definitely the chemistry, almost as a study, I remember the reason I first started listening to it, I was trying to get a perspective on certain historical moments. Like it was interesting. I tuned in to learn history. Yeah. I came for the history and like stayed for the chaos and the crack open and clean out. And yeah, this, it was almost, I listened to Rogan like this sometimes. I'll relisten to an episode to try to understand why was this so fun to listen to? It's almost like trying to analyze humor or something like that. But it's nice from a conversational perspective, like why was this so easy to listen to? And with History of Hyenas, like why is the chemistry so good? It's so, it's weird. It's weird. Cause there's not many podcasts like, I don't know any with the chemistry like that. It's interesting. And it's kind of sad that the fling with a prostitute in Vegas has to end, you know? But that's what makes it special. It's the Bukowski thing with the fog. The British Office, one of my favorite shows was that it ended very quick. It's only a couple of seasons or something like that. And that was tragic, but that took guts to just end it. Given all the money you could have made, given all the, you just end it. And that's what makes it truly special. Yeah. And I'll tell you, man, I'll just emphasize it. Cause I marvel at it too. Cause as a guy who tries to always figure out what the causes of things, I gotta be honest, man. Looking back on that, even with retrospective wisdom, you know, that 2020 hindsight, we've been done a couple of months now, it's something that I can't explain. It's something that I don't know how you quantify it. I don't know how you describe it. It's musical. It's really kind of rhythmic. Maybe like a Netflix show about history. That's in the future with the two of you. You guys will meet like the way you meet with a fling like a decade from now at a diner and you're both way fatter and uglier and then you just reminisce over some cigarettes and coffee. It could be. Yeah, it could be. Yeah. It's definitely a classic podcast that people can go back and appreciate. It's fast paced and it was unique. What was it like to research for, I mean, it was really scholarly, the depth of research that you performed. It sometimes felt like you almost read an entire Wikipedia article beforehand. Or like. Exactly true. We were, we were one fan, we attracted such funny people to that podcast and the fans were so funny and one fan called us nicknamed as Wikipedia sluts. And so it just stuck. Yeah. We just would read Wikipedia. I would do a lot more research than Chris. And so I would actually, you know, once in a while he'd get into it too. But for very interesting episodes, I got some subject matter would just pull me in. Like Bernie Madoff, just to think of one that was recent, it was one of our last ones. And I think one of our better episodes and I'm glad that it kind of ended after that because it was rare to, I think we started to slip a little bit. I got fascinated and I got, I did a lot of research for Bernie Madoff, but usually, yeah, we'd pull up Wikipedia and we'd have fun. We were sort of the antithesis of Dan Carlin. I mean, you went to Dan Carlin for accuracy and thoughtfulness and you went to us for, it was a hang with history. That's why history hyenas was such an appropriate name because it was, it was a little bit of history. Some, some episodes were more hyena, more wild and a little history and some were a little more dense, like the battle of Crete and less hyena. So you were, you were always going to get both, you're either going to get a majority of one or the other. Yeah. And Dan Carlin is the lion, I guess. Yeah. And you guys, predictably good. Yeah. I mean, what, what are your thoughts about, I mean, he's a storyteller too. He gets a lot of criticism for the, from the historians, quote unquote. That's why he likes to knock. He keeps saying he's not a historian, but what's your, what are your thoughts about the hardcore history with Dan Carlin? Like, was he an inspiration to the podcast you were doing or, or like an account, like a, almost like a reverse psychology inspiration where you wanted to do some kind of opposing type of podcast in history or was history always just like a, a launching pad to just talk shit about human nature? More of the latter. I wasn't even aware of his podcast when we started. Oh, interesting. Yeah. And so we, it was just very organic, again, like the chemistry, me and Chris became very good friends. We started the podcast. First we did a web series called Bay Ridge Boys, which has its sort of little cult following. We did like five episodes and ended it. And then we did the podcast and hi, hyenas were my favorite animal and I talk about them passionately and I told Chris about them and then he started appreciating them and we both love history. I majored in history. It's one of the things I love. I go to museums all the time. I go to his, I do history tours, so does he. And so it was just sort of a natural, let's do a history podcast and it gave us something to talk about each episode to sort of lean our, you know, hang our hats on and, and riff off of. So it had nothing to do with dance. What I think about dance, I think it's great. I think even if he's inaccurate in the opinions of the historical community, it starts conversations, which is good. It's like this thing where people go, oh, it's dangerous rhetoric. It's like, no, rhetoric only becomes dangerous when education fails. What's going on in America is education has failed. So if you call someone online dangerous, it's not him that's dangerous. It's the fucking stupid people that's dangerous. And it's the fault of this country. We didn't listen to Aristotle. The future of a civilization depends on public education and we failed. Education has failed. Kids are, kids are not interested in shit. And so in some sense, those dance podcasts and podcasts can be incredibly educational. Because he's a, the storytelling that pulls you in ultimately leads to you internalizing these stories and like remembering them and thinking through them and all those kinds of things that is much more powerful than you book on history. That's accurate. I think often it inspires you to go learn more. So it's like, I know we did that. I mean, you know, I, people would go, Hey, I went and learned about this because they knew with us, there was no pretense, which was great that we had no standard. So it's like, nobody came to us for historical accuracy, but I was kind of turned on by the fact that it inspired people to go learn about this stuff or to at least know like Battle of Crete, like you said, a very underappreciated battle. Even Winston Churchill said from here on, we will no longer say that Greeks fight like heroes, but heroes fight like Greeks. I mean, it was a monumental battle and you know, not talked about enough. And I, our podcast would inspire people to go actually learn more, to go listen to Dan Carlin or to go pick up a book or to do research on their own. And so I think podcasts, Dan Carlin's obviously much more accurate than us, but it's good that people are going to podcasts like yours and to learn shit. Joe was, is really like the progenitor of that. I mean, you know, having intellectuals on and getting the public interested with this new medium in, in people who are intelligent. It's nice. Cause you know, what the mainstream press pushes out is horseshit, gorgeous horseshit. It's got a beautiful veneer, but no substance. And so this, this is a nice pushback. Yeah. The authenticity of Joe's show. I mean, I'm through, I started listening from the very beginning, you know, doing my in grad school, you know, like a technical person and he just pulled me in. And made me curious to learn about all kinds of things and use my own critical reasoning skills on some of the bullshit guests he's had and some of the most inspiring guests he's had. And so I teach you to think, can you, I don't know much about Bernie Madoff as a small tangent. Can you, can you tell me who the hell is Bernie Madoff? Oh, Bernie Madoff is the GOAT. The greatest thief of all time, dude. Hedge fund guy, ran a hedge fund and pulled, stole the most money in the history of America. I mean a con artist and he does, people obviously he's become, he's a household name because of the magnitude of his crime, but you got to appreciate, again, you got to appreciate what went into this and how long he was able to pull it off by tricking the smartest and richest people in the world and a brilliant scam. The con man, con man is short for confidence man. And it came from, yeah, a con man, basically they exude confidence and they trick people by playing on their ego and blind spots. And the word comes from a guy, I can't remember where, but what he used to do, I can't remember the guy's name, whatever, you can Google it, con man. But it's very interesting. The first con man that is on record, what he would do, he would go to very rich people and he'd be very well dressed, right? And he'd go, I bet you, you don't have the confidence to give me your watch. And he would play on the egos of these very powerful and rich people and they would give them the watch for some reason, some sort of reverse psychology bullshit. And he'd take the watch and he would just steal it because basically saying like, you don't have the confidence to give me the watch because you don't, I don't know, you don't think I'm going to give it back. And he would just take it. So Bernie Madoff was a very sophisticated con man. And again, we were talking about people pretending to be the opposite of what they are. And he hid his thievery in how available he was to his clients, how he would show up at every bar mitzvah, every birthday, he was always available for their phone calls. And he played on their egos. He made it so people wanted to invest in him, like they were competing. He made it very exclusive. He wouldn't just take anyone. And there was a method behind that madness because he wanted the whales that wouldn't notice that he had this pyramid scheme going. And so what he would do is he would just rob from the richer and he just kept, it was like he'd pay back the richer with the guy who was a little, and it was a pyramid scheme. And he was able to do it for so long and steal so much money. And he would win people over with the scheme because with that scheme, he was the only guy who could provide, who could guarantee like a 1% return even during times of recession. And because he was such a good con man, he hijacked people's reasoning with his charm. And that's what con artists do. That's what psychopaths do. They're so fucking charming. They get you in that Volkswagen Beetle. Because if they use their reasoning for one second, they'd go, hey, nobody can provide 1% returns during recessions. How the fuck is this guy doing it? I'll tell you how he's doing it. He's stealing from another guy to pay you. You fucking idiot. So charisma is essential to that. Maybe you can help explain something to me, something I have been affected by. I'm getting way too loud for your listeners, there's going to be comments like, tell this guy to calm down. I'm sorry, I'm Greek, I'm positive. No, that's beautiful. I love it. Something that I have been thinking about and have encountered indirectly is Jeffrey Epstein. And I have a sense because of MIT, because of all the other people that have been touched, the wrong term, by Jeffrey Epstein in the sense that literally and figuratively. And it always felt to me like there's not a deep conspiracy, I don't know, but it felt to me like it's not some deeply rooted conspiracy where like Eric Weinstein thinks that there's some probability that Jeffrey Epstein is a front for like an intelligence agency, whether it's Israeli or the CIA, I don't know, but is a front for something much, much bigger. And then I always thought that he's just, maybe you can correct me, but more of the Bernie Madoff variety, where he's just a charismatic guy who maybe is psychopathic in some sense, so you know, also a pedophile, but just charismatic and is able to convince people of that 1% of any idea that in the case of scientists is able to convince these people that their ideas matter. So one thing scientists don't really, you know, despite what people say, I don't think they care about money as much as people think. I mean, people are ridiculous when they think that, yeah, that's why people get into science for the money. Yeah, right. The personalities that get into science are obsessed with minutia and they do the scientific method. You know how boring that is? Like you have to have a love for it in order to do it. But the thing, what drives you is for your ideas to be then heard. Like when a rich guy comes over, probably super charismatic, is going to tell you that your ideas, especially for some of these outsiders at MIT, at Harvard, at Caltech, all these like sort of big science, like physics, biology, artificial intelligence, computing fields, to hear somebody say that your ideas are brilliant and ideas matter, it's pretty powerful, especially when you've been an outsider. Like he's talked to a bunch of people who had outsider ideas. You know, the big negative for me of modern academia is that most people, actually like most communities, most people think the same and there's just these brilliant outsiders and the outsiders are just derided. And so when you have Jeffrey Epstein, like a hyena, sorry, sorry, sorry, going on the outside and picking off these brilliant minds that are the outsiders, he can use charisma to convince them to collaborate with him, to take his funding and then thereby he builds a reputation, like slowly accumulates these people that actually results in a network of like some of those brilliant people in the world, you know, and then pulls in people like Bill Gates and I don't know, political figures. I tend to believe that one person can do that. Yeah. I mean, look at Hitler, charisma is blinding. I think that's what Kahneman, speaking of Bernie Madoff, that's one of their major tools is flattery, glib, superficial charm. It creates those blind spots. People want to hear how great they are. They want to be flattered. It takes your defenses down, plays to our ego, how much we're all just pieces of garbage and want to hear how great we are. We want that love from our mother and our father. That's Freudian and they know because they're not burdened with that need, they're not burdened with that empathy or emotions and they just see things very calculatively. They play, they know that we're prey in their game and they use that against us and that is why someone who is not that intelligent, like Hitler, can probably convince a lot more intelligent people, you know, and that's why we can't give Tim Dillon power because then, you know, he already stands on a stage. I mean, if we let that guy, I mean, he will just take over a country and everyone who can't cook well will be eliminated. So it's like... I wonder why he keeps complimenting me when we're in private. Exactly. Be careful. He looks at me just, I like your suit. I like the cut of your jib. Yeah, definitely. You gotta be careful of that kid. He's Hitler. But it's crazy to think about... Clip that, please. Internet. I mean, Quentin Tarantino said it to Pat, I mean, in his script, personality goes a long way, dude. I mean, personality can usurp common sense and reason of the smartest people. These absolute smartest people can be hypnotized. It's sort of like a sexy woman. It's like, you can just, you can be tricked because we have such a blind spot for, you know, for flattery. Yeah, I wonder. I think there's a BBC documentary on, I think it's called something like Charisma, Hitler's Charisma or something like that. It was quite, I mean, that one focused more about the power of the speeches. But I wonder if most of the success or the rise of Hitler and the Third Reich had to do with the charisma of Hitler when he's alone in a room with somebody, with the generals, just one on one. Like, I wonder if that's the essential element of just being able to just look into a person's eyes, like flatter them or whatever is needed to earn their trust and then convince them of anything you want. Right. Yeah. I mean, you're right. Because that's the one piece of history we don't have. We don't know. We do know that the kid crushed. I mean, he was a headliner. He got up there and his hair would flop. I mean, he crushed it. Yeah, there's certain elements about nationalism and pride that are really powerful. Like a lot of us humans, I think, long for that, for the feeling of belonging. And when some charismatic leader makes us feel like we belong to a group, the amount of evil we can do to other humans because of that, it's endless. Nobody wants to look and nobody wants to do the work to be better or look at where they messed up. Why does it always have to be the Jews that escape? You know, it's like, get over it, guys. I mean, it's like they killed Jesus. You get over it. Yeah. Okay. It's a long time ago. I mean, move on. I'm Jewish. I understand because we do run the central banks. And the weather. And the weather. Yeah. Don't forget about the weather. That's a big one. That's a funny one that people created. Like, who gives a shit? What is the weather? Like, what's the importance of the weather? All right. The Jews made it rain outside. Good. You got to fuck. You know, they made it snow. Okay. You get a day off. Thank the Jews. Yeah. It's like, yeah, there's certain conspiracies that make me like flat earth. Like, what's the motive? What's the motivation for lying that the earth is round? Like, what's the conspiracy? Yeah. What does anyone get out of that? Yeah. What is exactly the profit? What's the strategy? Do you have any, from a historical perspective or just a human perspective, conspiracy theories you connect with? Or you're not necessarily conspiratorial? I'm not necessarily conspiratorial. Nobody cares that much. But then, you know, what happens is you find out this one or this two, and you start questioning everything. And you start questioning everything, man. It's like, you know, the Vietnam War started, that was a lie. That was a false flag. And then next thing you know, everything's a false flag. There are some strange things on 9 11. You know, there's some strange things from a scientific perspective. I'm no scientist, but it's like, you know, yeah, three steel framed skyscrapers falling on the same day in the same way. A lot of people say, oh, they were hit by planes. It's like, yeah, but that's not why they fell. They fell because of fires and usually, not usually, all the time, except for three times. And there was buildings that have burned for longer than that. And there might be good explanations, but the lack of transparency, it's like, I feel like government. And building seven's weird. I mean, the way it kind of died, just a neat, just a neat, the physical, I mean, you're a scientist. Is that, well, I don't, I, is there resistance from the steel and free fall, not all scientists know everything. I'm just a computer guy. Cause I had some questions I wanted to ask you about my biology, but yeah, so exactly. I don't understand biology. I don't understand the melting point of steel. I don't, but I'm just the common sense human that looks at government and institutions when they try to communicate. And there's a certain human element where you can sense that there's dishonesty going on. And dishonesty might not be deeply rooted in a conspiracy theory and something malevolent. It might just be rooted more likely to me in a basic fear of losing your job. So when you have a bunch of people that are afraid of losing their job, you know, and they just don't want to like the origins of the virus, whether it came from a lab or not, you know, that's a pretty, I know a lot of biologists behind a closed doors that, that say it's very likely it was leaked from the lab. But like, they don't want to talk about it because there's not good evidence either way. It's mostly you're just using common sense. So they're waiting for good evidence to come out in either direction. But just like nobody in positions of institutional, like centralized power wants to just honestly say, we don't know, or on the point of masks or all those kinds of things to say, you know, here's the best evidence we have. We're not sure we're trying to figure that out. We're desperately trying to figure that out or just like honesty, especially in the modern day, that's the hope I have for the 21st centuries. People seem to detect bullshit much, much better because of the internet. Yeah. Internet. Yeah. Yeah. And we seem to... But they also believe crazy shit too. There's no Yang without a Yang, I guess. But I think the conspiracy theories arise only when the people in positions of power and government institutions are full of shit. Like the air will be taken out of the conspiracy theories if the people in elected power would be much more honest. Like just like real. Yeah, people like Andrew Yang, whatever you think about him, just more honest. He just like says whatever the hell comes to mind. By the way, he's running for New York mayor. Mayor, yeah. Do you have opinions? Yeah, it's no good. I like Andrew Yang and it's no good. I'd be honest with you. I'm a lifelong New Yorker. I mean, I'm a New Yorker. Well, you're a New Yorker, so nothing's good. Well, something is good. Okay. Let's be honest about New York. It's a very socially liberal place. It is the head of the snake. New York is the country. If New York, when New York's not doing good, country's not doing good. It's the most important city, DC, New York. It's really Rome. Be honest. It's, maybe I'm biased. I don't know. No. Yeah. We just, New Yorkers, we walk around everywhere and we go, this is just like New York, but not New York. It's, but New York needs, and I'm a guy who leans left. You know, I just, I lean left and that's just what it is. A dictator? Is that where you're going? No, we need. Are we going back to Stalin again? We need, it's a money town. Let's be, come on, man. I mean, New York is a money town. And Wall Street, and then when AOC and her cronies at the local level rejected that Amazon thing, you're going like, what do you think makes cities? What's going to create jobs in the 21st century? What do we need? More nail salons? Yeah. More pizza places? I mean, we're living in the tech revolution and you know, whatever your opinions are about Jeff Bezos, that's the world, tech. And they want you to come here. Of course you give them tax breaks. That's why companies go anywhere. She's so fucking utopian and that progressive wing is so utopian and that always ends in disaster because it's not rooted in reality. It doesn't accept the reality that people are self interested. Now they're going to do this 14%, 15% tax hike on people making a million dollars more. In New York City, a million dollars is not that much. So people are going to flee New York. The tax base is going to flee. New York's going to fall to shit like it did before. So you're saying it basically needs a more capitalist front, like capitalistic type of thinker. Yes. Bloomberg, Giuliani when he was still sane and his hair wasn't melting off his face. Prosecutor. You need a tough, I mean, I don't know what's happened to that guy. He's lost it. But it's fun. Yeah. It's fun to watch. Yeah. It's fun to watch him be just like, uh, Trump's lackey. Like, yeah, boy, whatever you want, boss. I'll just say whatever you want, boss. But New York is a money town that needs a money guy and sort of more of a Republican. I have to say on the local level, as more of a guy who leans left, I'll just be honest. It's a tough city that needs a tough mayor, not some guy who's going like, I understand we all need free money. You know, Andrew Yang I think is right in the big picture because all the real jobs are somewhere else. You look at those Asian cities, you go like, oh, that's what our cities used to look like at the industrial revolution. You know, there was like, there was jobs and people were making things here. Now you look at those cities in Asia and you're going like, wow. And then you go to Detroit and you're like, yeah, we're done. You go to Cleveland, you go, we were done. So I don't actually, it's, it's funny. The reason I really like Andrew Yang is I've learned a lot every time he talks, like it's not his opinions. He's just giving a lot of data, like information, which I just start a podcast. Don't run for mayor. Yeah, that's true. He already has a podcast. I think Yang speaks. Who doesn't? Who does it? Who does it now? That's the way we communicate. I don't even talk to people unless it's on a podcast. What? Listen, man, I'm a, I'm not going to criticize that because there is something like I talked to my dad on a podcast for four hours and I'm not sure I would ever talk to him in the way we talked without the podcast. What does he do? Uh, physicist. Oh shit. But like, yeah, it's a episode 100. And you know, I, uh, the, the way I recorded that podcast is I tried to put my ego aside. It's actually really tough to talk to your dad, especially because you're giving him a platform. Uh, especially, so at that time there's already a bit of a platform for this podcast. And so there's this, as a son, you think like, oh, here it goes with this bullshit again. Like that's the natural son thought you have. But at the same time, I wanted to, the way I thought about it is in 20 years when I look back, like I want to do a conversation where I'm happy with it, you know? So I want to make him shine. But I also called him out on like, why were you so distant, like, like all of that kind of stuff. Yeah. It was very difficult to do, but it was really important to do. And I don't think I'd be able to do it without a, without a microphone. Right. Listen, how often do we sit there and just focus our attention and just look at the other person? I, I don't know, man. This is not even recording right now. I just invited you over. Just so we could actually, you're right. The podcast does make, like I listen, I've been listening to every word you've been saying. And if we weren't doing a podcast, I might be looking at my phone or being self conscious about something else or nervous or anxious, especially with people close to you. I mean, that was, I recommend that actually for people to talk to their family on a podcast or like a fake or not. That's really powerful. It made me realize that there's a clear distinction between the conversations we usually have with humans and those we have when a podcast is being recorded. What the fuck were we talking on before that? I knew you were going to lose your train of thought on that one because that's a big one. There's a motion behind that one. A podcast with dad is going to take, that's going to take you to a place that took you to a place. It took you outside of interviewer. New York. It went to a place. New York and Yang. Yeah. In New York and Yang. That's what really surprised me about, I like the psychoanalysis that you just threw in there. Yeah. I knew that. Yeah. That took you to a place. So Andrew Yang mentioned. Do you respect me now, dad? MIT, is it enough? Fucking million people listening to this. I got 14 Rogans. Is it enough, dad? I'm creating robots. Is it enough for you? It's never enough. That's what drives you probably. That's probably what drives me. That's what gives meaning to life is it's never enough. And I hope to pass that on to my kids one day. That nothing's ever enough. Whether they're robot or human, right? Your kids. Most likely. Let's be honest. Robot. You might call one of your robot. Do you love your robot? Are you starting to love your... Is it going to be like that Pygmalion thing? You create them and then they kill you. But even while they're killing you, you got a tear. The tear. A slow one. One tear. One tear. And just. Yeah. Why are you doing this Frankenstein? Why? Why? But I loved you. Those would be the last words out of my mouth. I just want to mention something on the, that it costs $400,000. Over $400,000 per year to support one person in prison in New York. Like when I heard that number, it was really confusing to me. Like that it costs that much, 400K per person. And it was really refreshing to hear a politician describe a particular problem with data. That this is this prison industrial complex, whatever the hell it is. And whether the solution, it's unclear what the solution is. I think he has solutions, but just the honesty of presenting that information was refreshing. And I'm not sure a capitalistic person would solve that. Those kinds of problems he might make worse. And I'm not, I'm a huge fan of capitalism. I think the free market is the way we make progress in this world, but it seems to go wrong in certain directions. Like the military industrial complex, the prison industrial complex, anything that ends with industrial complex. And so I'm not sure. I'm not sure if all of the problems, you're basically saying, let's put New York's problems aside. We need to have New York shine first to do what it does best. Essentially. Yeah. And then we will fix them, well, and then we can focus on the problems. But if you just say like, here's a problem, here's a problem, here's a problem, let's make sure we have the safety net that protects us against all of these kinds of problems. That's not going to, that's going to kill the city, the spirit of the city that is in your biased opinion, the Rome of the world. That said, a lot of people are fleeing New York. Yeah, that's why I say it. That's the reality of the situation is, you know, I'm all for the public good, but yeah, there needs to be a back to that Greek expression, pan metroniris, and I also think the free market is responsible for progress. I think it's the most natural thing, the thing that's most aligned with human nature, which is self interest. And which I'm not to the extent that Ayn Rand would, but I do believe people are mostly self interested, especially with one gun to the head, morals are out the window, you know, it's about survival. So, you know, create a system that respects that and acknowledges that, but socialism works very well, at least right now, as a check as to temper the excesses of capitalism and in certain scenarios is the more appropriate system, you know, in a vacuum. So one being prisons or, you know, you know, governance, you know, parks. Maybe even, well, and this is a difficult one, but in healthcare, healthcare, it's unclear what to write. There's a lot of debates there. Yeah. Doctors want boats. Yeah. So I guess you're voting for AOC you're saying. No, I'm not voting for AOC, but I do, it's just a tough one. That's a tough one. But ultimately, the Hippocratic Oath, it's like, how do you turn people away, man? How do you do that to people? It's like, it's a tough thing to reconcile helping people, curing people with the marketplace. It's just, I can understand why that one's so tough. And then you got hypochondriacs, of course, who drain the system, you know, like people who are having anxiety, like me who had COVID and called 14, you know, I called 14 ambulances. So and then of course we're fat and the free market made us fat because it played the marketing made us want all this junk food and that's a burden on the healthcare system. So we got to do something about that. We got to get creative. We need new thinkers. I'll be one of them. When you go to a fast food restaurant, you stand on a scale. If you're over a certain thing, you can't be served. It's good for the healthcare system. You know, you just handed a salad and say, sorry, this burger is illegal for right now. If you achieve these certain BMI goals, then you can, you can have this burger, but right now you can't. And that's where the state's important. Yeah. Okay. To regulate our freedoms. No slurpees. I'm with you Bloomberg. Well, I'm with you to go along. I think the salads are too expensive. They should be subsidized. If you, if you go to like a fast food joint, the burger is always going to be cheaper than the salad. And this does not make sense. We should run on this platform. I'll be your vice president or ban burgers for, for people of a certain weight and make salads cheap. Three day work weeks. Why has that not happened yet? Wait, wait. Okay. Where are you going with this one? Dude, good for the economy. Stimulates the economy, right? More shifts, creates more jobs, more people spending because they have more leisure time, boosts the leisure economy, you know? Why are we still doing the five day work week that, that was, that was tempered from the seven day work week. That was, so the seven, it used to be seven day work week, it used to be like, and people who are just these libertarians, it's like, come on dude, what, what is this fresh, are we freshmen in college? Yeah. You're going to, we're going to talk about Ayn Rand next. Like let's talk about reality. Okay. And human nature. People are fucking greedy. They lie. They, you know, there's no end to up, which is one of my favorite expressions. No end to up. No end to up. There's no end to up. Can we dissect that? Yeah. From a Randian perspective. There's no end to up, which is, uh, you just keep going. It's never enough. Oh, never enough. Oh, it's never enough. No end to up. No end to up more. And you know, you have to reconcile your fact that you're going to die. So like this no end up thing is that balance is, is just as valuable as progress. So we have to reconcile those two things and put them on a seesaw and figure out how to get two people who have the equal weight to keep it like that. And that's the goal. And it constantly vacillates, uh, according to the time you sometimes you need a little more socialism. Sometimes you need a little more capitalism. You gotta, you gotta, you gotta fly the plane, man. You gotta fly the plane, dude. What's your, um, looking back at history, is there a moment, time period in history, a person in history that's most fascinating to you? You mentioned Bernie Madoff, maybe second to Bernie Madoff. Is there in a battle of Crete, is there something that you've always been curious about? Even if it's something you haven't actually researched that well yet, just something that pulled at your curiosity that, uh, instructed the way you think about the world. An individual or an event or an event, individual, uh, you know, yeah. Moment in history or a person in history. Um, there's a few, but, uh, you know, queen Elizabeth, uh, the Elizabethan era, you know, the sun never sets in the British empire, very successful empire, uh, what an absolute success story that is, is for a leader and a woman, um, can you tell a little bit about her story? I actually don't know much about the British empire. Yeah. She had a good run. I think it's like 70 years, you know, as a Shakespeare, they, you know, the, oh, I guess what's the word, Pax Romana, the, the, uh, the period of Rome that it was at peace and they flourished like a couple of emperors like Trajan or some good ones. And I think he was part of the Pax Romana that sort of just a peace and a comfortable flourishing time and England, uh, had sort of that in their empire under her successful reign. She murdered her cousin. She, you know, the movies, there's, uh, you know, um, Kate Blanchett plays her and, and does so. And she didn't win the Oscar because fucking Gwyneth Paltrow put a, put a British accent on in Shakespeare in love. It's a tragedy. Why do I know this? Because I'm not a full man. I'm a comedian, which means I do skits and I perform, um, and I, uh, Kate Blanchett's incredible actress at great movies. She was just so, and here's the thing, she, she never got married. She was, she was so, um, astute at public relations and, and, and, and imagine how strong you got to be as a woman to lead the greatest empire maybe known to man at the time and to do so, so successfully. How Machiavellian you have to be, how idealist you have to be, how much of a good marketer you have to be. Propaganda machine was on point. She was married to England. She was adored the way she adorned herself. You walked in, you're like, holy men, God just walked in here. And of course she got fucked. I mean, who doesn't fuck? We all fuck. Even robots one day will fuck. But she was, she, she did that propaganda thing and historians aren't, uh, haven't, they haven't decided this, but I believe she fucked. And I believe she did that as a tool of propaganda. I'm married to England. So you, oh, you're, you're directly referring to like using sex as a way to manipulate people. Well, she, her, she was known as like the, the Virgin queen. And uh, and her thing was like, I'm married to England. Like I can't be distracted by man or woman, blah, blah, blah. She never had any kids, nothing. I think she did that as a tool of manipulation, which you need. Rulers need to, you know, Obama made you feel good and then he went and bombed, carpet bombed everywhere. You need to feel good about your guy, no matter how evil they are. And she was fucking a dictator. But when you look back at her, everyone's like, oh my God, she was so great. The horror and the shit that she had to do, she didn't put that in the history books, but that's what probably was part of what made her successful. And um, she's a fascinating character to, to ponder because she was so successful and, and England flourished so much. And it's just fascinating to me because she was the great Virgin queen. And can you think of, there's no other woman who was that, I mean, Angela Merkel, I mean, come on. I mean, there's nobody who comes close and defeating the Spanish Armada, I think that happened under her. I mean, I'm no professional, but I mean, the, the woman crushed. And uh, Do you think it's more effective to lead by love, which just sounds like what she did from the PR perspective or by fear? Where do you, where do you land on that? That's a great question. Um, I'm not, we got to ask Joe. Well, yeah, this is interesting cause I think leading in the 21st century in whatever ways is different. I think it's very difficult to lead by fear. I mean, um, that's why I find Putin fascinating and like really fascinating. Like is he a relic of another era or is he something that will still be necessary in the coming decades for certain nations? I think he's a, I don't think he's a relic from another era. I think his background, I think he is who you think he is because his background was in espionage. His background was in subterfuge and espionage. I think I've said the word subterfuge maybe 10 times now, but he, uh, like big words, intellectuals. I just sitting here with you. It's my, it's time to flex. Um, but he, um, he's very good at that, right? Like, uh, controlling people with psychology and even if you look at the way he sort of used the internet and, um, has sort of been, you know, gotten in to the citizens of other countries opinions and it's very KGB. He also looks great without a shirt on a pony on a horse on a horse. Yeah. Yeah. I thought he would choose a pony cause a pony smaller makes him would, uh, would you, would you put queen Elizabeth as the greatest leader of all time? Probably. Yeah. If you look at Elizabeth as a woman and you look at, uh, you look at the, the length of the reign, I think it's like 70 something years or something like that, that she reigned success man, success. She used the church, she used public psychology, Shakespeare, the greatest playwright of all time, uh, under her reign, you know, people were going to plays and, and, uh, it was a, it was a success front and she was marauding everywhere else marauding and culling resources for the empire and just say a absolute successful. It's even, uh, a token of her success. We don't consider her a dictator. Yeah. She's a dictator, you know, she was queen. I, this is my thing I love about the feudal system that these fucking countries still have feudal systems. They're celebrating a horrible thing, divine right of Kings oppression, Kings were dictators and now they have fucking ceremonial. Why don't we have a ceremonial Fuhrer? What is in German? He doesn't do any of the bad stuff. He just rolls around and does, I mean, it's like, what the fuck? There's no difference between a Hitler and a fucking King. They did the same horrible shit. Why not a fucking ceremonial conqueror, Alexander the Great walks in, rapes a little bit, but it's all fun. It's for ceremony. He represents the country. Macedonia is Greek. It's interesting to see that, uh, some you're starting to see a bit of that in Russia was Stalin, actually the celebration of a, of a man that helped win the great patriotic war. Yeah. Right. So like you, you're already starting to see that it's very possible in history books, you'll be seen as maybe like a Genghis Khan type of character and you forget the millions that he tortured. So you're one of the most successful and brilliant people the world has ever seen. So you're the good person to ask, uh, for advice. You know, there's a lot of young people that look up to you, uh, God bless their souls and hearts. Made the right choice. What advice would you give to a young person? Maybe to yourself, to a young version of yourself, you know, and just how to live a successful, a good life. Be doggedly you. I think the magic happens when you are stubbornly doggedly you and you meet other people who are doing the same and, um, the real magic of life, the real true currency in this ephemeral life is sort of the communication that happens between people. Uh, that's the real currency, friendships, love, it's, it's cliche, but it's a, I think the meaning of life is to experience, to experience love. And, uh, I think, uh, people often mistake, maybe it's because of Hollywood films and things like that, that love is a feeling, but it's not, it's an action. So, uh, that took me a while to learn and I think that's why I've made decisions since that I think have been good for me and healthy for me. Love is an action. People can say things, you can feel things, um, that doesn't mean they're necessarily real. It's all chemical reactions. It's all, um, tied to our immaturity and, uh, psychological issues and, uh, survival, but action when some, when you do things, when you act out of love and you, the, that's, that's what it's about. Is there, uh, times when you were younger where you were kind of dishonest with who you are to yourself in terms of like, what, what kind of things did you have to do to, to shake yourself up and be like, okay, I thought, um, I thought I'm going to be a scientist, but instead I realized I'm going to do this. Yeah. My parents were funny. Yeah. My, my comedy is a hard, hard thing to explain to, uh, you know, an immigrant mother who came here and under Nazi occupied Crete and became a human rights lawyer and lawyer. And, uh, my brother's a lawyer and my father was a lawyer, you know, clawed his way up. His dad was a, was a, um, so your disappointment, um, the black sheep. Yeah. My brother went to Oxford Georgetown law at Brown, you know, has a master's in pot, you know, law degrees. My mother has followed up for law degrees, uh, you know, uh, she was on the human rights commission in New York up for a judgeship under Dinkins, um, wrote a, you know, um, she was the editor of Unitar. She wrote a seminal piece on the human rights of children for the United Nations. Um, and, uh, yeah, it was a comedian. I was always a fuck up. And, uh, the thing that I was best at, the only thing I was ever decent at was just like making people laugh. I don't know why. I don't know where that comes from, but, uh, was there ever a question or did, was there a moment where you decided this is what I'm going to do? There was a moment after I graduated college. Yeah. I was just thinking about all types of stuff that other people imposed on me. And, um, I was honest with myself and once I figured out it was an actual career path, I wasn't even aware back then the internet wasn't huge, you know, late 99, 2000 it wasn't big yet. So I didn't, I thought Robin Williams was just like an actor. I didn't know there was comedy clubs and all. So once I learned that I was just like, I tried it. I suffer from massive anxiety. I remember the first time I did comedy, my arms went numb. I started having a massive panic attack. I have my first set. I can show it to you. I suggest I just come video. Yeah. I'm video. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. And the reason why I kept saying thank you is because I forgot my old jokes. I was so scared. And then they laughed because of the amount of times I said thank you. And then once they laughed, I was, I remembered the whole thing and I did the five minutes and I remember getting off. And for a person who never felt like he had a place anywhere, nothing ever felt right. That felt like, okay, I found it. This is what I'm supposed to do. This is it. It was the only time in my life I felt that I haven't felt that sense. Never felt it before. So that's the only thing I can do. And yeah, I had that, you know, it's funny cause there's a similar experience like immigrant family and the world tells you to do certain things and you think that's right, but, but then you put yourself in situations by luck probably where it's like, oh, this, this, this feels right. I don't know what this means, but this feels right. I think the biggest moment like that for me was, I don't know what to make of it exactly, but when I met Spot, the robot, the legged robot, it was like five years ago, it felt like this, the depth of fascinating ideas that are yet to be explored with this thing. This felt like a journey. It was like a door that opened and I was like, I don't want to be a professor. At that point I realized I don't want to do sort of a generic stuff. I want to do something crazy. I want to do something big. That's the reason I stepped away from MIT. That's the reason I have this burning desire to do a startup. That's the reason I came to Austin. Yeah. I don't know what the hell it all means, but you just kind of follow that. That's awesome. That sounds like you're following what's doggedly you. And also I think I just to, just to piggyback off it, I think that means no matter what it is, because I think our, the American dream is sold like, Hey, if you're not Beyonce or if you're not famous, you're not worth it. I hate that. And that's what I love so much about certain countries like Sweden, it's like where everyone has healthcare and stuff like that because everyone's a little is valued more. It's like whatever, if you want to be a doorman, do it like it's all the same. Prince was not happy. There's no, just because you're rich or famous, you're still the same guy with your possessions are a lot little, you know? It's like, I have met some doormen. I have met some tax cappers that I lie to you not are more fascinating. I have comedians are horrible people, so I want to get away from all of them. I have very few friends, Paul Verzi, Tim Dillon, who are comedians because they're awful, awful people. Some of the people who you know the most, who are the most famous are not who they say they are. Usually that's the case. They're putting on that public facade because they're fucking sociopaths and they're horrible people and some of the most beautiful people I've met and the most interesting people I've met have regular jobs. There is no shame in any fucking job. We don't all have to be rappers with like rims. It's just a weird thing. Yeah. Fame is a drug and yeah, comedians, I agree with you. There's some part of me that knows that there'll be a moment in my life when I'm standing there with like a sword or a knife in my stomach and looking at Tim Dillon's smiling face saying you shouldn't have trusted me, you stupid fuck. So on that note, Yannis, I've been a huge fan of yours. I love what you're doing with Long Days Now, your new podcast, and I obviously love all the stuff you've done before with History of Hyenas, the chemistry you have with yourself is also fun to watch. So man, I'm a huge fan. It's a huge honor that you come down here. Thanks so much for talking to me. It means so much to me to hear you say that. I really appreciate it. I'm a big fan of yours and having me on has been amazing and just thank you, man. Thank you for having me on and people, if they want to watch my special, it's called Blowing the Light. It's on YouTube and please come listen to Long Days of Podcasts and let's go eat some barbecue. Let's do it. Thanks for listening to this conversation with Yannis Papas and thank you to Wine Access, Blinkist, Magic Spoon, and Indeed. Check them out in the description to support this podcast. And now let me leave you with some words from Karl Marx. Revolutions are the locomotives of history. Thank you for listening and hope to see you next time. And um, See, we just changed your mind. You kind of like the immortality. Yeah. I kind of like it. No. So there'll be no thirsts. No. You can always put it off. You don't want to bang this girl. You're like, ah, put it off. But now I'm thinking about Muslim heaven and they may be offering the best deal. I mean, if it was an expo and they had a booth, I may go with them because they offer, they offer 62 or 72, but then I'd get sick of them. I'd want to, I don't know. I always wondered like, are you given the 62 virgins or you choose, can you create them like an avatar, like a video game, or are you just given? I don't know what the number, why it's important to have that high number. First of all, I think it's a mistranslation about the virgins, but outside of that, outside of that, I feel like the conversation is really important. I don't think they ever specify like what kind of books these girls read. Like what are they, what are they into? Like the quality of the conversation, I think if you're talking about eternity, the quality of the intellect and the conversation and the personalities is way more important. And the Greeks have an ancient, ancient expression, pat metronaros stone, which my mother always used to say, which is everything in moderation, nothing in excess. So trying to always get the status quo and uh, yeah, that many women, eventually it's like the magic Johnson effect, Isaiah Thomas effect. It's just too much and you're going to end up, you're going to end up banging a dude is what I'm saying. You're going to get sick of it cause it's too much and there's going to be a eunuch that finds its way into your harem. That's been proven throughout history, every empire, when you have all that power. And again, this goes back to power corrupting. If you have, if there's no struggle, there's no meaning, there's the value is from the journey, the, the working hard to struggle. And if it's just given to you because you're a Sultan or you're Alexander the Great or whatever, you're going to get bored and you're going to bang a dude. That's it's, I think that's a scientific axiom actually. Eventually you'll get bored and bang a dude. Yeah, but I think it won't stop there. I think you'll go to animals, you go to robot. I mean, eventually it all ends up in robots and then the robots rebel and then the humans will be destroyed. Yeah. I'm sorry. If, if we're speaking truth, you said the value of life, one of the highest ideals is to seek truth. I think if we're being honest. Can I ask you a quick question? Yes. If you, if you live in a small, I come from small islands, right? And so there's a stereotype that that's where they bang animals. But if you come from a very small community, you know, an island or something, and you have the choice of banging a family member or an animal, which one is worse on the moral scale? Because you're technically not related to the animal. Right. This is interesting. I mean, these are human constructs, these ideas, but yet for me personally, taboo would be more taboo to, uh, to, to have sex with a family member. Yeah. I mean, animal. I mean, okay. It's good to know where you stand on that. I think if viewers, you know, if they didn't have, they didn't know they had that question. I just, they just learned a little bit about you. And now I know. I look forward to the internet clipping that out. Yeah. I mean, there, there is, listen, uh, in some, outside of, outside of that, I do think about that a lot. I think it's kind of ridiculous, uh, about morality connected to animals in terms of all the, the, the factory farming and so on. It seems like that's one of the things we'll look, cause I love meat, but I kind of feel bad about it and, and bad in a way where I think if we look like a hundred years from now, we'll look back at this time as like one of the great like tortures and injustices that we humans have committed. And I mean, all that has to do with the sex with the animal has to do with consent and about the experience of suffering of animals. The reason I think about that personally a lot, cause I think about robotics, I think about creating artificial consciousnesses, uh, or artificial like beings that have some elements of the human nature. And then you start to think like, well, what does it mean to suffer? What does it mean for entity to exist such that it deserves rights? This is something that the founding fathers were thinking about, like, you know, all men are created equal. What does it, which, who is included in the men who, who's not in that, in that sentence and our animals included in that are robots. I honestly think that there will be a civil rights movement for robots in the future. I don't, I don't know. Is that the Turing test, the way you try to, is that what they call it where you're trying to see if AI can think like a human or whatever, or feel like a human? Well, it's a, the Turing test closely defined as more about talk like a human. So you can, you can imagine systems that are able to, you can have a conversation like this and I would be a robot for example, but that doesn't mean I would do in a, in society. That doesn't mean I deserve rights or that doesn't mean I would be conscious. It doesn't mean that I would be able to suffer and to experience pleasure and dream and all those kinds of human things. The question isn't whether you're able to talk, which is passed in the Turing test. The question is whether you're able to feel, to be, I mean, I go back to suffering. The thing that the, that our documents protect us against is suffering. Like we don't want humans to suffer. And if a robot can suffer, that discussion starts being about like, well, shouldn't we protect them? Currently we don't protect animals. We protect that dog. There's laws. There's actual legislation that protects dogs for torture places. Yeah. And you know what? Dogs is something I don't think people really understand enough about. It's one of my obsessions. So they, they, my dad always used to say those, he goes, those things are, those things are basically human. And I mean, they dream, they have anxiety. And what people often overlook about dogs is without dogs, we wouldn't be here. We would not have ever evolved from hunter gatherer to agrarian to, you know, civilization. We wouldn't have cities. We wouldn't have anything. I mean, they are our partner in survival and they are a magical animal. There's no, there's no animal that was, it was like destiny almost. I mean, a malleable animal, there's no animal that's that malleable that in a few generations you can tailor to a specific job that you need. And without that animal, without dogs doing that animal, protecting our crops from, from, you know scavengers and stuff like that, you know, the list goes on. We wouldn't be here. So we, that's an often overlooked fact that human evolution was not done in a vacuum just with humans. Without dogs, we would have never evolved. I mean, we weren't the apex predator for most of our existence. We weren't even the apex predator. I mean, we're getting eaten by hyenas, which is my favorite animal and you know, that's kind of an injustice to, I mean, I'm kind of mad at dogs. We deserve to get eaten by hyenas, but without dogs, we wouldn't be here and dogs, dogs deserve the protection. So do horses. They fucking lugged us around for thousands of years and now these fucking German psychopaths are eating them or whatever. We should not eat horse meat just on like, be a good dude, man. These things lugged us around for generations, they're beautiful, you know, ride them or I don't know. I don't know, but it rubs me the wrong way that we eat horses. Yeah, the horses one is interesting and one of my favorite books is Animal Farm by Orwell and the horses don't get a good ending in that, I kind of, my spirit animal I suppose is the horse from Animal Farm, Boxer, where he says, I will work harder. That's his motto. I work really hard at stupid things. That's basically what I, I just hit my head against the wall for no reason whatsoever. But that probably fulfills, you have a big brain, you were probably born with a big brain that kind of fulfills. It's killing neurons. It's exercise for you. Yeah. Yeah. Don't you think some animals deserve to be eaten though? Kind of like. Hyenas. Come on, dude. I mean, you gotta respect the hyena. Okay, so let's look, first of all, let me just comment on the dog thing. There is like conferences on dog cognition from a perspective of people that study psychology, cognitive science, neuroscience, dogs are fascinating. The way they move their eyes, they're able to, they're the only other animal besides humans, they're able to communicate with their eyes. They can look at a thing and look back at you and look back at the thing to communicate that we're all like through our eyes, communicate that we're collaborating. So every other animal uses their eyes to actually look at things. The dogs use it to like communicate with you, with us humans. It's fascinating. There are a lot of other elements of dogs that are amazing. Yeah, I mean, if it wasn't for them, they're the ones, they were our first alarm system for predators. They would defend us. I mean, the Basenji is one of the most ancient dogs. I mean, they're tiny, but they're fearless and they would chase off lions. Like there'd be packs of them and they chase off lions and protect the tribes. I even get tingles like thinking about dogs because I have a dog, I love my dog. And there's something about when you're walking with your dog off leash in the woods, there's something about it that's like, that tugs at that millions of years of evolution, like that gut, you know, it's like, I had a Finnish friend of mine, he's a comic, Tommy Valamies once told me, he was like, he was like, the gut, he's like, I believe in it. Like that gut, you know, when you have that feeling, he's like, always trust that because that is million, those are all your ancestors. That's the survival instinct of all your ancestors at the beginning of time, you know, telling you like, Hey, something's off here, something's, you know, so don't get in the car with Ted Bundy is what I'm saying, ladies, how fucking stupid, who, how can you fall for that? You know, he's got a fucking sling on, don't get in. Yeah. Follow the gut. My question to you, are psychopaths essentially robots? So first of all, let's not, you're using the word robot in a derogatory way that I, I'm triggered by. Okay. So I feel offended. You should be because you know what, people are always scared of robots, but I actually, I have, I've made the sort of, uh, I, I've made it to say, Hey, I've, I thought about it and like robot, robots have been nothing but helpful. It's the people we should be scared of. Again, we're kind of missing the most destructive thing is us because it's, but robots are helpful. I mean, this is a fucking robot. You know, I went on hotel tonight, I'm already booked up, you know, I got my, I can change my flight if, if this barbecue with Rogan goes 16 hours, which whatever Rogan wants to do, I'll do it. If he wants to kick me in the chest, I'll let him kick me in the chest, whatever. Robots are helpful. No? Yeah. Uh, tanks and autonomous weapons systems don't kill people. People kill people. Yeah. That's yeah. Yeah. The NRA is about to collect that for you. Uh, a lot of love for dogs. I appreciate it very much. And at the same time, you have the other thing that people seem to have love for, which is cats. And on the flip side of everything you've said, I'm trying to understand what have cats ever done for human civilization? They keep rodents away. The domesticated cat is very important. Keeps the rodents away. Yeah. That's what they were domesticated for. I mean, they're psychopathic killers who ended up killing, uh, innocent, um, neighborhood chipmunks and, and birds, uh, they really affect the, uh, the balance of the local ecosystem. But if you have love for cats too, not as much as dogs, I mean, dogs are, like you said, they look at humans. I actually read an article that some people were theorizing they're smarter than chimps because of the way they can work with humans. And there was one border collie that spoke like 300 words, like a quarter, like a lang, almost part of the language. And their nose is like a mat. I mean, that's like magic, dude. If you can smell in my ass to what I had for breakfast from miles away, that's intelligence. That's intelligence. I mean, in some ways that their nose, if you were to put it on a scale, maybe their nose is more intelligent than our brain for what it does. You know, it's like, I mean, dude, they can smell you from miles away. You ever see a dog just like sniffing, catching? I mean, it's smelling like, I don't remember the, the, the date on it, but it's like, they have like millions of receptors or something where we only, you know, thank God we don't have their nose. That would be, that would make sex weird, be a little too intense. I think you mentioned when you were talking about Woody Allen separating the, the art from the artist. So that brings to mind Vladimir Putin. How about that transition? I don't know. I'm so sorry. But if you look at just powerful leaders throughout history, Stalin, Hitler, but even modern ones like Putin, and we're talking about power. How do you explain them? You said that power reveals, not corrupts, but do you think there's some element to which power corrupted Hitler, power corrupted Stalin after he gained power? And the same with Putin. When Putin gained power in 2000, do you think the amount of power that he was in possession with for many years, do you think that corrupted him? I mean, we're joking about dictators get the job done. There is some sense in certain countries where a dictator is the only thing that can stabilize a nation. The counter argument to that for democracies is like, yeah, but that's a short term solution for a long term problem. So you want to embrace chaos with democracy. That might be violent. There might be a lot of just constant changing of leadership. There might be a lot of corruption in the short term, but if you stay strong with the ideals of democracy, then you'll be ultimately create something that as beautiful and stable as the United States. The sad thing is, is I don't know if history tells that story. It's like I said, you look at Greece, you look at Rome, democracy kind of failed. The majority of Rome, the most successful empire that we've had, was a dictatorship for most of its run. But I do believe in a republic, which is sort of a limited democracy. I do believe in what we have here. I believe in common law. I believe in individual rights. But yeah, I think you said it. Nobody could have said it better. Yeah. It's a short term solution. You look at Saddam Hussein, he kind of, when we took him out, then there was a lot of infighting that happened that he was kind of keeping at bay because he was a strong man, dictator. Well, he's an interesting one, sorry to interrupt. From my understanding, I'm sure people will correct me, but when Saddam Hussein first came to power, he was, he's quite progressive. So like the, as far as I understand, the signs of an evil dictator weren't exactly there. So again, there's, I don't know if power revealed or power corrupted. Or that could have been the initial subterfuge to kind of get everybody, you know, Hitler also is a champion of the people. It's built some new roads. It's with psychopaths too. And that's why it's interesting to me. I'm not sure if power corrupts psychopaths. And now that we know that we can do these CAT scans and brain scans, we know that they're born that way. Power definitely corrupts people who have the capacity to feel and for empathy. Power I'm not sure. I don't think power corrupts people who were born psychopathic with that condition or sociopaths who had, who, you know, who were closer to psychopath and then had some traumatic life. You know, I just think, you know, the best way to get away with whatever nefarious thing you want to do to feel, I guess the only thing psychopaths can feel is that excitement, is to pretend to be the opposite of what you are. That's what, that's what killers do. That's what the worst people, look at Bill Cosby. I mean, he was, what better way to hide, you know, it's like what wokeness is now. It's like, I'm such a great person and then you're like, are you? It's a great, the best way to hide is to pretend to be the opposite of what you are. Just like Ted Bundy. I'm just an innocent, helpful guy. And then boom, next thing you know, you're getting your tit bit off. That's really well said. It's actually kind of funny because I talk about love a lot. And I think the people that kind of look at me with squinty eyes, they wonder like how many bodies are in that closet, you know what I mean? Like there's something about the duality of like, we're so skeptical as a culture. Like if somebody is just like, seems to be kind of, sort of, I don't know, positive and all that kind of, you know, how do I put it? Just simple, simple minded in the positivity they express. They think like, okay, there's some demons in there. Yeah. Especially if you're a New Yorker, we don't trust any, the nicer you are, the more skeptical we are. Yeah. I've struggled with that down here. And they're like, nah, dude, just, I wanted to show you the best tacos, man. And I'm like, did you really, what do you want? Because in New York, it's like, if anyone's nice to you, they want something. And that's, the pro side to that is it makes you very street smart. The downside to that is it makes you way too cynical. Yeah. I've definitely experienced that here in Texas, but people are super, super nice. And they're like, do all this cool shit for you and you wonder, what's the angle? What are we doing here? You mentioned hyenas as your favorite animal. I forgot to ask you, what the hell were you thinking? Why is a hyena is your favorite animal? Yeah. It's a fascinating animal. Let's look at the whole animal kingdom. Like why is it, where do you put, so you like dogs, love my favorite, your favorite is dogs, but they're kind of outside the animal kingdom because you're thinking about wolves. So the animal kingdom is in nature. Dogs escaped nature. They kind of did. Uh, together with humans, like in a collaborative way, exactly. So within nature, within the animal kingdom, what, who's, uh, why not lions? Because lions are predictable. Lions are just, you know, they're regal and kind of, they bore me. It's like the hot chick. It's like, we get it. You were born the best. Yeah. You know, I like a scrappy, by any means necessary, intelligent and cunning. But aren't they dishonest? Yeah. And that's why I like them. Yes. They're dishonest. They employ chicanery. They, uh, they're, and that's just a sign of how intelligent they are and how self reliant they are and how brutal they are. Um, they're brutally honest in how much they lie, you know, because it's just, they're trying to get the job done. You know, lions are just like, they're, they're too gifted. Everyone hates the fucking, you know, if I went to school with you, I'd be like, of course, Lex knows the fucking answer. Yeah. Lex was born smarter than me. Yeah. You know, and you'd probably hate me because I was the kid always seeking attention and making people, it's like, that's not interesting. The guy that claws his way to the top and those are hyenas. They're also fascinating just by, uh, merely who they are. I mean, they're not related to any other animal. They're more closely related to cats than they are dogs, even though they look like a dog. Yeah. They're, but they're very, like very tangentially related even to cats. So they're their own kind of thing, which is kind of mysterious. I don't think they fully figured out and uh, they, the pseudo penis thing is the, is the, I mean, Can you explain the pseudo penis? Yeah. So the, it's a matriarchal society by the way. So that's the unique in and of itself that this, we're talking about an apex predator that is a matriarchal, much like, uh, you know, the praying mantis. It's very rare though. And they are fucking brutal and vicious and the women are bigger and they let their cubs fight, a lot of fratricide and they do that because they're like, Hey, you're weaker. I let your brother kill you. And uh, the women have penises, the women have pseudo penises that they give birth out of and the birth is violent, but they, they roll around with just huge pieces. They're glue guns are just fucking swinging, you know, and the women are just run the show and uh, it's just cool that they have these pseudo penises. It's almost romantic the way you describe it. They have the strongest bite force. They they pulverize bone. Like when they eat an animal, the animal's gone. There's no bones. They eat everything. They can pulverize their bite is so powerful. They pulverize bone and eat it. So if they consume an animal, it, the animal was there and then the animal's gone. There's no nothing for the vultures there to, uh, to, to, to grab. Yeah. I'm going to have to revisit the hyenas because my experience with the heinous was from, uh, first of all, history is your show, uh, has rebranded them for me, but, uh, the lion king, which is, uh, a cartoon, I guess, that, uh, I get emotional at every time I, I hope that probably a father issues, every guy probably just, you just have feelings. You're a good guy. I mean, everyone has feelings. Yeah. Yeah. That one gets everybody. I don't know. I get, I get every father son movie, like blow with Johnny Depp, uh, and, uh, really Yoda. Damn. That's a good movie. And whenever there's like, um, like the disappointment in the father that his son has become like this incredibly successful drug lord that then ends up with nothing in, in, in prison, uh, just the sadness of them communicating through letters, man, it gets me every time, but, but, you know, uh, there, the hyenas are not presented that well in that, um, No, they're usually portrayed as like, uh, it's, it's really, it's, it's, it's, it's really sad that they're portrayed that way as lions. Like lions aren't dicks. Lions are dicks. They, the, the, the, the alpha lions will kill the cubs of another rival. They do all types of dick shit. Yeah. And, um, yeah, it's, uh, the hyenas are more interesting. Like they'll just roll in like a hyena will like, like you said, the lie, you know, cause when you watch the Serengeti, you know, animals will hang out with each other. They're like by water. So one hyena will just kind of roll in and pretend like it's not hungry and then bang. They'll use any means necessary to take an animal down. Like lions will just use brute strength. Hyenas use cunning and you can even go on the internet and find, uh, memes of this where hyenas will grab the big animal by the balls and just like, we'll sneak up behind it and bite its balls. And you'll watch an animal 10 size, 10 times the size of the hyena just slowly go down. It's brutal, but it's fucking hilarious. So I, I think that's, uh, I don't know if you follow the channel, um, nature's metal that, that one weighs heavy on me. Um, with the hyenas on the balls, I it's tough to, to intellectualize it. It's tough to think that the entirety of life on earth has this history of, uh, predators being violent, just like just the murder that we come from. It's crazy. I, it, uh, just like when we're talking about meditating on death, I actually, I keep following and unfollowing that Instagram channel because like sometimes it's too much. Like I can't, I can't continue with the day after like seeing the brutality, the honest brutality of that. I don't know how to make sense of it. It's important to acknowledge, I think, cause that it's real and we do come from that. We are, we evolve from that. It's important. We still do that. We're just hidden from it. You know, when you go to the supermarket and get your slab of meat, you know, you're so disconnected from where that meat came from. It came from that and often that's uglier to watch than because there's some honesty, you know, the, the, the, the nature channels only show, uh, that's why we have so much sympathy with the prey. And this is where I think the same thing with mafia movies, they don't show what the mafia really does. They glorify the good parts. That's why I like state of grace cause it's really just shaking down old people and fucking being dicks. It's not driving nice cars and being like, you know, so, and, and animal channels do the same thing. They only show when the cheetah gets it because that's, that's the exciting part. But what most people don't know is that those predators strike out almost always a majority of the time, the prey wins. And so if you saw that and put it in context, you might not hate it as much when the predator actually gets the little fawn or whatever, because it's so many fawns got away. It's so hard to capture your prey. And you know, we, we don't have the, the, the, they no, no documentary is going to sit around and show you the 99 times the cheetah didn't catch. Thank you for this perspective. It's murder is difficult. So like this is the, they never talk about for people who murder how difficult that is like to trap somebody, to convince them to come back to your place, give it some respect, put some respect on Ted Bundy's name. Yeah. It's not easy to convince somebody to get in your Volkswagen Beagle and, and the cleanup. And then you have to kind of plan ahead because you want to keep doing the murder, mass murder. You gotta learn how to saw them up, put them in duffel bags, bury, you gotta learn to dig, you gotta learn how to hide. You gotta learn to lie. I mean, it's a lot that goes into it that we need to put a little respect on. Yeah. Yeah. And you have to figure out which tools work the best for the sawing and all those kinds of things. Um, um, so thank you for the perspective. That's what I was hoping we would bring to this table. So you, um, uh, you got a little bit Greek in you. Uh, one of the episodes on, on a history hyenas, you talked about the battle of Crete where the Greeks, your people in, uh, uh, in 19, I guess 41 and the early stages of the world war II, there's one of the most epic battles of the war. Uh, in fact, in 1941 in a speech made at the Reichstag, Hitler paid tribute to the bravery of the Greek saying, it must be said, uh, for the sake of historical truth that amongst all our opponents, only the Greeks fought with the endless courage and defiance of death. So okay. What do you make of this battle? What do you make of the spirit of the Greek people? This is one of the closest things to me because my mother was actually on the island of Crete during this, the first aerial invasion in history. A lot of people don't know that. So this is a very significant battle. Um, first time there was an invasion from the sky, um, and, uh, my mother was a little girl and she lived through four years of a Nazi occupation there. So my mother was a human rights lawyer and everything, but she just always hated Germans. It's just what it is. She hated Germans and she never got over it. So the most progressive, open minded woman just could not get over this. Um, it's a monumental battle that a lot of historians in retrospect have now looked back on and said, because the Nazis, first off, you got to take it back to when Hitler instructed Mussolini. Cause let's be honest, Mussolini was Hitler's bitch. You know what I mean? It was like, if it, well, you know, if it was fantasy island, Hitler was the fucking and the, and Mussolini was boss, the plane. Mussolini ever say no to Hitler or even maybe it's always like, yes, yes, yes, we will do it. And, uh, it's like, yeah, it takes, you have to take Greece. And so, um, yeah, so Italy being much bigger than Greece, Greece is a tiny country, nine, 10 million. So Italy invaded Greece, um, you know, um, and Aukey day's a big, it's a big holiday for Greeks. And this speaks to the spirit Greeks in fight until we have a common enemy and then we unite, you see it throughout history, Sparta and Athens, you see it in Greek families where the brothers will fight. But then as soon as we have a common enemy, we unite and maybe it's an overactive brain. We think too much, our traditions, philosophy, and we overthink things and we fight with each other and take things personally, we're ultra passionate. But when Italy said, Hey, we're going to move troops through, you know, uh, a Greek said Aukey, which means no, and that was, um, and then Italy attacked and, uh, we beat the shit out of them. A much bigger country, much, uh, more well equipped country. Greece beat the shit of them, kicked them back into Albania, actually not only repelled them, actually like conquered some ground in Albania, pushed them back. And then Hitler was like, fuck, you know, I was planning my March to Russia, uh, but I have to go down because he basically said to Mussolini, like, you know, you're basically bitch slapped. I'm like, I got to do this myself because you're such a fucking bitch. So then the Nazis invaded Greece. Obviously they took the mainland with fight and shot out. The Greeks never give credit to the British and New Zealand and Australian troops that were there. You know, they were a large part of this, the majority of it, but the Greeks fight dude, civilians. I mean, they fought, you know, the Ottomans were there 400 years. You go to Greece. Now there's no evidence. There's virtually no evidence of them ever being there. That's the Greek spirit. Kick them out and we kicked out hummus too. So it's like their culture's gone. You're gone. Cause Greeks are, uh, it's philoptimo. It's called philoptimo. And it's a real thing. Philoptimo is a, it's very little translate. You can't translate it, but it's kind of like honor, loyalty, friendship, uh, altruism. It's a, it's, you can't define it, but Greeks know it and we're taught it from our, from our, uh, families. It's a vibe, man. It's a Greek cultural thing and we're an old culture and philoptimo is what it's called philoptimo. And it's, um, it's love, it's passion and it comes out and it comes out. And so, um, so Hitler had to postpone his invasion of, um, of, uh, Russia went down the island of Crete took 10 days to conquer. It's an island to put that in perspective, the country of France fell in three or four days. I can't even remember cause they fucking just rolled over. So what is it? What does a couple of hours matter when you're that much of a fucking pussy? Okay. What is a couple out in 12 hour fucking three or four days, the island of Crete took the Germans 10 days to conquer. And because of that, and because of the Greek resistance, Hitler had to postpone his invasion of Russia to winter. And of course that was, you know, that was his downfall just as it was Napoleon's and a never dude, never try to invade Russia. They got millions of people to throw at death. Every time you read about Russians in history books, like, and a million died. I mean, it's like, you just guys throw millions of people at the problem and don't fuck with that Russian winter and don't fuck with Russian people, dude, they're tough. People in New York know that you don't go to fucking sheep set bay and start talking shit. You'll end up in a fucking car trunk and they'll brutally murder you. I do not fuck with Russians. Amen. And then there's a, I mean, there's a lot of people, a lot of historians argue that that battle was because of the Russian winter because of delaying the Russian invasion, but also psychologically delaying the invasion. It was the first time, I think it was the first time the Germans failed, not, or didn't succeed like they wanted to early in the war, which is a little like psychologically the impact of that I think is immeasurable. And also a lot of people argue from a military strategy perspective that the, just like you said, it was an aerial attack and that Hitler didn't think that the, that kind of attack would then be useful for the rest of the war. So that's, that's a really part where, whereas it might've been very useful. So it's a, it's really interesting how these little battles can steer the directions of war. Of course, me growing up in the Soviet Union, we didn't hear much about this battle. Just like you said, millions of Soviets died. All those people in history that you read about dying, those are all civilians, but I mean, not all, but a very large number of them are civilians and their stories, obviously that's the rooted, the literature, the poetry, the music, just the way people talk, the way they drink vodka, the way they love, the way they hate, the way they fear. That's all like rooted in World War II and World War I. And so, but we never kind of think about Europe and we certainly, growing up, didn't think about their role in the United States. All this, there's plenty of stories of heroism in the Soviet Union, enough to, enough for many lifetimes. So, but it was fascinating to read from a Greek perspective, cause I, you know, I don't have many Greek friends, I hope you didn't change that. This is the beginning of a love affair of your people. Yeah. But likewise, the Americans don't hear about the Soviet contribution to the end of World War II because obviously we became, you know, enemies after that because of the two systems. But yeah, without the Russians, World War II wouldn't have been won either. Yeah. The stories are written by the victors. That's really interesting. I, just looking at the, at history, you wonder what's missing. I'll tell you what's missing that I know for a fact, cause my dad told, my dad told me combat's hell and he would tell me the reality of what it's really like. Guys pissing themselves, calling for their mother, the fog of war, obviously, fratricide happens all the time. It's pandemonium. I mean, there's skill involved, but I mean, there's no, like it's a lot of it is just luck. My dad said, he, my dad won three, he got, you know, medals, braille, purple hearts, all that shit. And he said, the reason was, is cause you can't, he always said, this is another thing. He told me, you can't pin a medal on a dead guy. So it's like, those are the guys who deserve it, but you can't pin a medal. You can't do the pomp and, and I'll tell you one thing is that it is written by the victors and all these leaders, they say we're in the front. We're not in the front. We're not in the front. Whenever the history books say he led his troops into battle. It's like, did he really, did he, so then how did he live? Cause they put like kids in the front, you know, it's like nobody limps back from the front with like a injury, you know, that's, that's army PR, you know, whenever you read, you know, 27 soldiers died, 14 were injured. The word injured is PR. That's like injured. Was he, did he sprain his ankle? Did he need, did he get carried off the court or, you know, he was maimed. I mean, he was like, his leg was blown off, you know, it's like, so, uh, I think that, you know, Alexander the Great was just kind of in the back on his horse and just kind of, he had his eunuch blow him a few times and he was like, is it bad up there? And then like after that he was like, okay, my scribe, give me my scribe. Okay. When you write this down, can you put me in the front? Yeah. And I was just making me a big hero and I was in there and then he, you know, he just blew his, you know, he had sex with his eunuch and rode off into the sunset because there's just no way you survive in the front, especially warfare back then. I mean, it's like brutal. Then again, you have like, uh, Genghis Khan. The sense I got that he was a little bit up on the front, at least the first. Yeah. Or is that also, is he a little bit Alexander the Great? Give me my scribe. Yeah. It's all lore. I mean, you ever play the game of telephone? You know, it's like, you know, there's no video cameras back then. So shit just get, turns into myth, you know, and, uh, there's no way he was in the front. There's no way he wouldn't have lived. You know, he was probably good on horseback cause those, those dudes were good on horseback. But it was like game of Thrones back then. You had all these different people and they kind of, yeah, the, the, the Mongols were wild dude. They are actually said like, um, they started like they were more adaptable to the horse because they were so good on horseback that kids started to be born like kind of bow legged like to fit the horse. It's wild. And they would stretch their heads and shit like that. They wrap them and stretch their heads. So they find like Mongol skulls and they look like cone heads and they were brutal and vicious and they would maraud and rape and all the fun stuff that, you know, when, you know, when you visit other places back then, there's no tchotchke stops and souvenir shops. What you do is you take women and those are the tokens, you know, you burn a few huts different. Tourism was different back then. Yeah. That's another difficult thing. So we're talking about nature and predators to think about the long stretch of history where we're just murder and we made so much progress, I guess, in the past couple of centuries. The United States is a shining example of that. But do you think also that it's that effect that we were, a lot of good things had to happen too or else we wouldn't be here. So do we just focus, isn't it like a car crash effect that like we're, you know, the rubber neck that everyone pulls over to see a car crash, are we just only focusing on the negative things of history because they're just more exciting to us? Like it's just not, it's boring to be like, yeah, and then there was a bunch of villagers and they ate every day and danced and loved. Yeah. I wonder, I wonder how different those people were, you know, like they might've had the same exact loves and fears and like they perhaps had the same kind of brilliant ideas in their head, if not more brilliant. And we kind of think about like this moment in history is like the most special moment. Like we're doing the coolest shit that we're doing the most amazing building and most amazing things. But maybe they were building amazing things in their different way with like less technological, but in the space of ideas, in the space of just all the different, the camaraderie and the space of like concepts, mathematics, all those kinds of things. Yeah. I mean, Greece, you look at the architecture, it still stands up. I mean, all the government, but it's still arguably, I mean, as far as objective beauty, it's hard to argue that Greco Roman, it's just something about it with the, with the columns. It's just, it's powerful. It's I don't know, even Ayn Rand would probably appreciate it. She doesn't, no, no, no. So in your history, hyenas that unfortunately has come to an end, we're talking about empires coming to an end, all empires fall. That one, it may rise again. Empires might rise again. Who knows? Who knows? I, I'm obviously a fan, so I hope it does rise again, but you've seemed to develop your own language. Can you, you know, it's what it is. What is, what is that? What the hell, is this some kind of medical condition or can you, can you explain like the linguistic essentials that catch us up to the linguistic essentials that people need to know to understand the way you speak? You know, Leopold and Loeb, you know the story of those two, they murdered that kid and they had this weird relationship. Anyway, it's an interesting thing to Google, Leopold and Loeb, these two guys who ended up murdering a kid because they developed their own language with each other and this own reality and this weird thing and they wanted to know what it's like to murder a kid and they murder a kid. It's a famous story in American lore and history or whatever, famous case. But this phenomenon, yeah, me and Chris got together. It wasn't as dark as Leopold and Loeb, we didn't murder a kid, but we murdered a podcast. Or at least stabbed it a few times. Yeah, it's, it was something in the organic chemistry of me and Chris that I think we'll both end up appreciating even probably more than we do now that it's mysterious. I got to be honest with you, it's, it was a thing that it wasn't conscious, wasn't intentional. It was something that happened in the music of our energies that just went. Like when you hear someone sing or when a jazz band hits a rhythm or even when I'm on stage and I just catch a rhythm, it's like, dude, I didn't make a choice there. I don't know what that is. I don't know how to explain it, but it comes from somewhere else and I don't know what

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